The Cost of Being Considerate?
by Mikauzoran
Summary: With Baaya away, it looks like Hakuba Saguru's birthday this year will be a dishearteningly solitary event…unless Kuroba Kaito and the Kaitou Kid have something to say about it.
1. The Worst Birthday Yet

Mikau: Hey everyone! Nice to meet you/Good to see you again! Thanks for taking an interest in my newest work. It's the sister story to The Truth in the Subconscious (TiS), but you don't have to read the other story to understand what's going on, even though there are a couple allusions to the first fic.

Speaking of TiS, icarusdg said that it could use a second chapter, and I thought, "You know what? She's right." so it's going to turn into a two or three part KaiShin fic when I have time. As a result, this fic, which was supposed to be a one-shot for Hakuba's birthday, will _probably_ turn into a two or three part HakuKai fic. If things work out, I think the two fics will turn into one nice interlocking story, but I'm going to try to keep it like Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles and xxxHolic, so that you guys don't have to read both, if you don't want to. That being said, please enjoy!

Disclaimer: If I owned it, I would have exhausted murder methods years ago. A big round of applause for Aoyama-sensei. That's impressive.

…

Hakuba sighed, taking off his reading glasses. He closed his eyes and gave the bridge of his nose a good pinch before exhaling slowly again.

The cold case that the young sleuth had been slaving over for the better part of the week was going absolutely nowhere, and he had half a mind to give up.

It's not like it would damage his reputation; no one knew he was working on it.

That was the beauty of investigating cold cases—no one could give him any flack if he couldn't solve it because no one else had been able to crack it either; however, whenever he did manage to unravel the mystery, the praise from his father and attention from the media would be nearly double that of a newer case.

There was also the less self-serving benefit of providing the family with closure after so many years of not knowing.

He was jarred from his thoughts by a light rapping on the sliding glass door to his balcony.

When he turned, he was utterly gobsmacked to find the Kaitou Kid himself standing in his bedroom, cape billowing rather fetchingly behind him.

"Good evening, Tantei-san," the thief purred with a smirk.

His teeth looked just about as pointy as a certain magician's spikey hair.

"Kid!" Hakuba gasped, jumping to his feet with enough force to send his desk chair clattering to the ground. He stared dumbly at the intruder for a second before lamely asking, "What are you doing here?"

"I came to give you a present," the phantom chuckled, taking out a pair of handcuffs and swinging them around his finger.

Saguru blinked. "A present? Do you mean to turn yourself in?"

"Nope." The kaitou grinned, slinking towards the detective like a large, predatory cat.

There was something different about the thief tonight—an aura of danger—that sent chills down Hakuba's spine.

He wasn't quite sure if they were good chills or bad chills, but his instincts told him, "Flee!" so his body automatically began backing up until he ran into his desk, nearly falling over.

All the while his guest still approached, swinging the cuffs in a bit of a hypnotic loop.

"I…I don't quite understand," Saguru stuttered as fear began to poke at the corners of his mind.

What if the person behind that monocle and top hat wasn't Kuroba? What if he'd been wrong? What if Kid wasn't his classmate but some nut job? What if he was actually dangerous?

Hakuba was cornered—alone in the house with a wanted criminal of questionable sanity.

Kid was mere feet away now. He laughed. "You're not _that_ inexperienced, are you?"

Before our hero could snort, "And just what is _that_ supposed to mean?" indignantly, the handcuffs came down on his wrists, and the phantom of the moonlight pushed him so that he was now sitting on top of the desk.

"Happy Birthday, Tantei-san," Kid whispered, crushing his lips against the startled blonde's.

Saguru's brain shut down, and he melted into the fiery kiss.

"Hakuba," Kid—Kuroba?—groaned.

"Saguru," the detective corrected between lip locks. "Please."

"Saguru." Kid tested the syllables on his tongue. He chuckled, moaning it again.

"Saguru…Saguru…"

Hearing his own name had never felt so good.

"Saguru…Honey…"

Honey?

Hmm.

He considered it for a minute before discovering that he didn't really mind the pet name…so long as Kid kept doing that thing with his tongue.

"Saguru, Honey, wake up."

He blinked and groaned several times before the sensation of Kid's lips faded and Baaya's cat-eye glasses came into focus.

"Baaya?" He slowly sat up and rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

The digital clock next to his bed told him that it was three in the morning.

"Baaya, what's the matter?"

"Sorry to wake you, Sweetheart, but I have to go. My nephew's just phoned me. My sister's been in an accident, and she'll need some looking after," his caretaker tried to report calmly, but her voice was trembling.

"Goodness…is she okay? Are _you_ okay?" Saguru gasped, coming out of the haze of sleep.

"I'm fine, Saguru. She'll be okay, but I have to go take care of her. I don't know how long I'll be, but…Saguru, Honey, I'm so sorry, but I don't think I'll make it home in time for your birthday."

"Baaya, don't worry about it," he tried to assure her, even though the selfish part of him wanted her to stay. "I'll manage on my own; it's Father you'll have to worry about. He's lost without you."

His foster mother rolled her eyes. "You know how you get when you're on one of your cases; you're as bad as your father…but I feel just awful leaving you alone on your birthday, Saguru."

"Father's here," he offered half-heartedly.

"Your father never remembers. I could tell him the day before, and he'd forget within the hour," Baaya scoffed.

"He's busy. His work is important," he mumbled the same thing he told himself whenever his father forgot special occasions, broke promises, or otherwise let Saguru down.

"Yes, but…you're important too," she sighed, gently cupping his cheek. "I wish you had normal parents. You're a good kid, Saguru, and you deserve better than what you've got."

"If I didn't have such lousy parents, I wouldn't have you to take care of me so that they wouldn't have to," Saguru snorted. "I'm fine. Really, so go, and don't feel bad. Your sister needs you more than I do right now." He bit his lip before he could take it back.

"I'll make it up to you when I get back, Sweetheart." She smiled sadly as she bent to kiss him on the forehead. "I'll make anything you want for a week."

"Even if it's absolute garbage?" The teen smirked.

Baaya cringed. "…Even if it's absolute garbage."

"Take care, Baaya," he chuckled.

"You too, Bocchama," she whispered, giving her charge a fond pat on the head.

He sighed when he was positive she was out of hearing range, rolling over onto his side and debating which to lament first: the fact that his birthday was going to suck worse than ever this year, or that he was having semi-erotic dreams about Kuroba—Kid? Whichever.

Hakuba gave up on feeling sorry for himself—he'd long ago learned that it _never_ did any good—and buried his face in the pillow, trying to re-conjure the feeling of those soft, insistent lips on his own.

000

A week passed, and, sure enough, Baaya was unable to make it back for his birthday.

She apologized incessantly and promised presents and junk food upon her return. She called his father as well and all but threatened the Superintendent that if he forgot Saguru's birthday again this year….

However, on the twenty-seventh, his father was called away on business. To his credit, as he was walking out the door, he paused, turned around, and said, "Your birthday's soon, isn't it? On Sunday?"

"Saturday," the sleuth corrected with a neutral look plastered on his face. He assured himself that his father was simply confused as to what day it was presently and not as to the date of his birth.

"I remember the day you were born," the elder Hakuba chuckled. "It poured all day long, and I was stuck in my office filing paperwork. I couldn't get away to go see you until the weekend…. Is there anything you want me to bring back from Kyoto for you?"

Saguru could think of a dozen trinkets he could ask for, but none of them were really worth his father going out of his way to purchase. Besides, he doubted that his father would remember.

"No. I don't really want anything. Have a safe trip."

000

That Saturday was a dreary one, but the weather forecast predicted that it would clear up just in time for the heist that the Kaitou Kid had been so kind to schedule for that night.

Saguru didn't even bother changing out of his pajamas until well after noon. He didn't see the point when he was planning to spend the entire day on the couch marathoning every detective movie he owned.

He ordered a pizza for lunch and munched on popcorn that he had mixed with peanuts and chocolate chips. For dinner, he got out the cake he had bought at the grocery the preceding day.

Saguru lit eighteen candles, sang Happy Birthday, and paused before blowing the little fire hazards out.

He really didn't have anything to wish for. Usually he wished to be the best detective in the world, but coming to Japan, seeing all of the superior teenage sleuths, and having circles run around him by a certain jewel thief had crushed that dream.

He considered wishing for Baaya's sister's swift recovery and his caretaker's prompt return home, but that seemed like more of thing you prayed for than something you used your birthday wish on.

He could always wish to catch Kid, but, at this point, he was fairly certain it'd be a waste of a wish; after all, one should never wish for something impossible, and he was beginning to question whether he actually wanted Kid caught or not.

Finally Saguru decided on wishing that things sucked less.

He blew out the quickly melting candles and ate the entire cake.

000

As the weatherman had promised, the weather was gorgeous for the Kid heist, much to Hakuba's chagrin.

He stood at attention by the target of the night's case, just waiting for the thief to show up, dye his hair bloody purple, mock him, and escape unscathed.

All he really wanted was to get it over with so that he could go home and change back into his pajamas. And maybe eat an entire tin of toffee.

The spectacle went fairly par-the-course that night, and Saguru found himself half-heartedly chasing his rival to the roof while the majority of the taskforce went after the dummy.

Kid stopped at the roof's edge and turned back around.

Saguru too came to a halt, wondering if he should even bother trying to restrain the thief. He'd only end up with confetti and silly string in uncomfortable places if he did lunge at Kid.

"You don't seem very into it this evening, Tantei-san," Kid hummed pensively. "Something on your mind?"

"It's been a rather lousy day, and I'm sort of just hoping it will end soon. If you don't mind, could you get on with it? Sorry. I don't mean to be rude," the detective sighed.

Kid blinked. "That bad, huh? Sorry you're having a rough day. I guess I could speed it up a bit. Catch."

Saguru just barely managed to catch the stone that the bandit tossed.

"Happy Birthday, Tantei-san." Kid smirked, pressing what looked to be a detonation switch before diving off of the skyscraper.

A second later, the sky lit up with a rainbow of colors spelling out "Happy Birthday, Hakuba Saguru" among balloons and starbursts. There was even a magnifying glass, a pipe, and a Union Jack.

Saguru blinked , absolutely dumbfounded, as he watched the show for a good fifteen minutes.

The Kaitou freaking Kid had set up a fireworks display in honor of his birthday.

The Kaitou freaking Kid had remembered his birthday—no. More than just remember, he had given Saguru a present—a costly, planned-out-extensively well-in-advance present.

His phone rang.

"Saguru?" It was his father. "Which character do you like better: that eyeball creature or Kapibara-san?"

The detective blinked. "Kapibara-san. May I ask why you're asking, Father?"

"I was just looking at some cell phone straps, and I thought maybe I should get you one as a souvenir. I wasn't really sure what you'd like, though," the elder Hakuba explained awkwardly.

Saguru blinked again. "Actually, I'm quite fond of Kapibara-san. That was very thoughtful of you. Thank you."

"You're welcome. I wanted to get you something, but I have no clue what boys your age are into. I feel bad leaving you alone on your birthday," the Superintendent continued. It'd been a long time since he'd had a conversation of any importance with his son, and he was feeling rather out of touch.

"It's fine, Father. I don't need anything, but I appreciate the thought." Saguru couldn't help but smile softly.

"…Saguru, what's that noise in the background? It sounds like something exploding."

"It's fireworks. The Kaitou Kid set them off in commemoration of the day of my birth. Just another offense to add to his record: setting off fireworks without a permit…again," the detective chuckled.

"Son, that rival of yours is a nutcase," Hakuba Senior snorted. "Have a good birthday."

"Thank you, Father. I will." He hung up with a smile.

Things were certainly ending on a high note.

000

Hakuba went to the station to fill out a report after he returned the jewel and suffered much teasing and heckling from the Division Two officers as a result of the "special treatment" he had received from Kid.

Nakamori-keibu seemed slightly annoyed (jealous, perhaps?), but wished the sleuth a happy birthday anyway.

Saguru arrived home at nine o'clock, and the instant he crossed the threshold, his phone began to ring, as if the caller had been watching and waiting for that precise moment.

The readout announced that Kuroba Kaito was calling for the second time in as many months.

Saguru arched an eyebrow in suspicion, but answered it anyway. "Hello? Hakuba Saguru speaking."

"Hey, Hakuba. It's Kuroba…but you knew that. What's up?" the cheery voice of the magician greeted him.

Saguru shifted the phone to his other ear as he slipped off his jacket. "Good evening, Kuroba. I've just returned home. May I inquire as to why you're phoning?"

"How was the heist?" Kaito ignored the question.

"Fine, thank you, though, I imagine you already knew that, since you've probably been glued to your television or, perhaps, mixed in with Kid's crowd of adoring fans," the detective snorted as he slipped off his shoes and stepped into his house scuffs, making his way to his bedroom without bothering to flip on the lights. He was tired.

"No, actually," Kuroba snickered. "I'm really busy, so I've been at home all night."

"Busy? Kid's biggest fan too busy to watch the heist? Whatever have you been up to, Kuroba?" Saguru went ahead and asked, even though he was 100…well, maybe 99% positive that his classmate had, in fact, been out committing grand larceny.

"I'm getting ready for a party," the joker sang. "Wanna come? It's tomorrow at five at my place."

"You're having another party? What's the occasion this time?"

"You don't _need_ a reason to party, Hakuba," Kaito scoffed. "Just think of it as a celebration of life. You can come, right?"

"I'm not sure, Kuroba. I'll have to check my schedule," the detective dodged.

"Come on. You can spare an hour or two," Kuroba pressed. "You had fun last time, didn't you? I don't care how busy you are. Nothing is more important than taking a break and spending time with friends. Even if _you_ don't think so, it's a collectivist culture, Hakuba; sometimes it's not about what you want. Sometimes you have to take one for the team and do what's best for the group, and you coming to the party is what's best for the group, so you'll be at my house at five, right?"

"R-right," the detective gave in.

There was no use trying to win against that silver tongue.

"Did you want me to bring anything?" Saguru sighed.

"Just yourself and a smile," the kaitou sang. Lord knows how he managed to sound so energetic after bouncing around all night like he did.

"And just who's going to be there, Kuroba?" the Brit sighed heavily again.

"All of your friends," Kaito chuckled.

"That's not a lot of people," Saguru accidentally grumbled out loud.

"More than you think, actually," Kaito shot back. "Look, I swear you'll have fun, so just come. I've still got some last minute stuff to take care of, so I've gotta go, but I'll see you tomorrow at five on my doorstep…or you'll see me at five fifteen on yours. Ciao!"

The line disconnected, and Saguru resisted the urge to sigh for the nth time that day.

He really didn't want to go to a party.

Even though Kid had lifted his spirits slightly with the fireworks show, he still wasn't quite in the mood to be around a house full of partiers.

He was still moping, and not really in a festive mood.

Though, Kuroba had gone to the trouble of personally inviting him…again.

Hmm…

What in the world was he going to wear?

000

At four fifty the next day he found himself standing on the Kurobas' front porch in white trousers, a sky blue shirt, and a green tie. He was certainly early, probably over-dressed, and seriously considering going back home.

"You know, usually people just ring the bell," Kaito snickered, having suddenly appeared out of nowhere. "Though, you could always knock, if you'd rather."

"K-Kuroba!" The Brit gave a start.

"Hey. Sup?" the class clown chuckled softly, giving his rival a big, friendly grin. "Whatcha doin' standing out on the porch? The party's inside."

"I was just…" Saguru looked at the host's wardrobe—a bright green, long-sleeved shirt under a bright blue, short-sleeved one. He was definitely over-dressed, but you never knew for sure with Kuroba; he tended to lean on the casual side.

"…thinking about running away, is what you were doing," Kaito snorted, taking the larger teen by the arm and dragging him into the house. "Not on my watch. Hey, everybody! Hakuba's here!"

The crowd turned at Kuroba's entrance and shot streamers as they shouted, "Surprise! Happy Birthday!"

Saguru blinked as Aoko-kun strapped a party hat to his head and he was handed a piece of cake. He looked incredulously at Kuroba. "You…for me…?"

Kaito smirked, putting on his own hat. (It was a tricky thing to make a smirk and a party hat work together, but Kuroba pulled it off.) "Yep."

"Why? Why would you…?" Saguru's brain was still stunned and not quite up to the task of making full sentences.

"Well, when you said that you didn't think anyone would throw you a party, it kind of got to me, and I thought that maybe I should throw you a party, if nobody else would. I mean, it doesn't cost a lot to be considerate, and I thought that it might mean a lot to you, but…was I wrong?" Kaito bit his lip and looked up hesitantly at Hakuba.

"N-No," Saguru assured. "It does mean a lot to me, and I do appreciate it very much. Thank you, Kuroba, but…when did I tell you that I didn't think anyone would throw me a party? I mean, it's completely true; I really didn't think anyone would bother, but…I don't quite remember telling you that."

"It was at my birthday party right after you gave me that scrapbook with all of those old Kaitou 1412 articles. I said something to the effect of, 'Yours is in two months, right?' and then you told me that there probably wouldn't be a party, but you wouldn't object, if I wanted to show up in your bedroom in handcuffs."

Saguru's entire face went as red as a rose. "I…don't remember ever saying that…out loud." He was beginning to think that maybe he sleep-walked and –talked and should probably check himself into a clinic. Perhaps he was suffering from memory lapses or blackouts or something. "Wait. Kuroba, I got you the complete collection of Lupin DVDs for your birthday, not a scrapbook."

Kaito blinked, and then it was _his _turn to turn scarlet. "Oh. Right. Of course you did because that was…" He smacked himself in the forehead and sighed. "…the dream I had about my birthday, not my actual party. Shoot…. Could you please disregard everything I just said?"

"No," the Brit replied all too quickly. "You had a dream where I asked you to come to my bedroom in handcuffs?" He hadn't thought his fetish was _that_ transparent.

"Yes, but…no, but…okay, it's not like it was _just_ you. Everybody in that dream was hitting on me…except for Aoko," the magician suddenly realized. "Unless you count hitting on me with her mop."

"Kuroba, we never count that," Saguru snorted.

"Okay then," Kaito sighed, making a grand gesture with his hands.

Suddenly a box appeared out of thin arm.

Kuroba handed it to the birthday boy. "Happy Birthday, Hakuba."

Saguru rolled his eyes and accepted the present, just letting the previous topic go. "Kuroba, if I get silly stringed, confetti-ed, or dyed as a result of opening this box, I am going to pick up my slice of cake and cream you in the face with it. Do we understand each other?"

"No tricks, Hakuba," Kaito promised.

Saguru paused and considered his options before finally deciding to chance opening the box. He was at least mildly surprised when nothing sprang out at him.

After removing sheet after sheet of tissue paper, Saguru found the two, hand-sewn, stuffed dolls at the bottom of the package. He blinked.

"It's you in your Sherlock Holmes outfit and me dressed as Kid," Kaito explained, anxiously waiting to see how his plushies were received.

"You…made these yourself?" Saguru stuttered, looking over the high-quality craftsmanship.

"You got a problem with guys who can sew?" Kuroba dared him to say something about it.

"No. Not at all. It's just…Kuroba, these are amazing."

"Yeah?" Kaito tried his hardest not to beam too much. "Thanks. I'm glad you like them; I was kind of worried. I'd already made them when I realized that it's kind of weird to give a teenage guy dolls for his birthday."

"It's alright. This _is_ Japan, after all. People of all ages can enjoy cute things without fear of being judged too much…. Though, upon my return to England, I'll have to say that the Kaito/Kid doll is for voodoo; however, here, I love them. Thank you, Kuroba."

"No big." Kaito shrugged, trying to look nonchalant. (It was a little hard for even _him_ to pull off what with that gigantic grin on his face.)

"Would you hold you for a second for me?" Saguru inquired, handing over the Kaito/Kid doll and digging in the box for the miniature pair of handcuffs he had seen when he'd pulled the dolls out.

"Sure." Kaito set down his drink on the little end table and took himself in miniature.

The little cuffs clicked shut around Kid's wrists as Hakuba chuckled, "I've got you now, Kid; you're under arrest. Now, let's see just who's behind that mask."

Kaito blinked, completely astounded, as Hakuba took the tiny top hat and monocle off of the mini-Kid.

"Kuroba Kaito. I always knew it was you," the detective snickered, a soft smile on his face.

"Hate to spoil your birthday, Hakuba," Kaito chuckled, maneuvering his miniature's wrists out of the cuffs. "but I'm just cosplaying. Your thief's in another castle."

"Well, blast," Saguru feigned frustration. "Care for a cuppa tea?"

"Don't mind if I do," Kaito snorted, taking one of the tiny tea cups and kettle from the box.

The only thing Aoko could do as she approached her two friends was stare. She had been going to ask if they needed more punch or cake, but… "Are you guys playing with dolls?"

"Yep." Kaito shot his crush a smug look.

"Kuroba _made_ them," Hakuba explained. "Good evening, Aoko-kun."

"Evening." Aoko just nodded and walked away; she had decided to go find Keiko or Akako-chan…somebody normal.

Kaito rolled his eyes, turning back to the detective. "Anyway, I called your lovely housekeeper and got the recipes for a trifle and a Bakewell tart. I was waiting for you to get here, so they're both still in the kitchen; wanna help me bring them out?"

Saguru stared in astonishment for a good minute before he responded. "You made my favorite desserts?"

"Aoko, Keiko-chan, Akako-chan, and my mom helped. Akako-chan and my mom did most of the work, though." Kaito shrugged. He wasn't very good in the kitchen.

"Wait. You called Baaya?"

"Yep. She sounds wonderful…super helpful, by the way, and tickled pink that you had such sweet friends." Kaito smirked.

Saguru rolled his eyes, but couldn't help smiling.

It was time to start his week of eating nothing but complete garbage. After all, the leftover desserts were sure to last him a few days, and Baaya would be home shortly after that.

"Thank you, Kuroba. It's good to know that I have such great friends, after all."

….

Mikau: So what did you think? I was tired when writing some sections of this, and, at the time, I thought it was pretty good, but the next morning when I was looking over it again, there were some times where all I could think was, "Kara, what the hell is this?" Overall, I'm pleased with how it turned out, but there are still parts where I shake my head and raise an eyebrow at myself. Anyway, what I think is inconsequential; what do _you_ think? If you have time, I'd appreciate it if you would take a minute to tell me what you liked, what you didn't, what you thought was humorous, and where you thought my jokes fell flat. Thank you so much for reading, and have a nice day!


	2. Losing Hope

Mikau: Hey guys! Thanks for coming back for more! I'm tired, so I'll keep it short and sweet for fear of making grievous spelling/grammar errors, but thank you so much to Kaito Dark, Wieselchen, Aniki-xvi, and Raifuujin for your reviews. I'm glad people are liking this story too, even though it's not as popular as its sister story, The Truth in the Subconscious. Anyway, enjoy the chapter!

Disclaimer: If I owned it, the suspenders never would have happened. I don't care if they are a useful gadget. Conan, Darling, you look like a complete and total nerd! That kid is going to get bullied with his dorky bowtie, oversized glasses, and goofy clothes.

….

Losing Hope

A week or two after his amazing surprise party, courtesy of his crush, Hakuba Saguru began to realize that Kuroba Kaito was not interested in being anything more than friends.

Of course, this had dawned upon him at Kuroba's own birthday party when Saguru had been ignored and overlooked in favor of whomever the magician kept texting and calling, but…when Kid had gone out of his way with the magnificent fireworks and Kuroba had thrown a whole party especially for him and made those hand-crafted dolls…he had allowed himself to hope that his beloved had gotten over his mystery caller.

Sadly, this was not the case.

Saguru and Kuroba had hung out several times since Hakuba's birthday party, but every time the impish brunette had had his phone close at hand, and twice he had texted with that bloody other person in Saguru's presence.

"Are the brussel sprouts not cooked to your liking, Bocchama?" Baaya's voice brought him back to the dinner table where he was poking at the veg on his plate repetitively with his fork.

"No. They're fine, Baaya. Thank you," he muttered, spearing one and popping it into his mouth.

It'd gotten a little cold. How long had he been zoning out?

"Thank you for the meal," Superintendent Hakuba said as he dabbed at the corner of his mouth with his napkin and rose to leave. "It was delicious as usual. I'll be in my study, if you'll bring tea at seven. Good night to the both of you."

"Yes, Sir. Good night," the servant replied dutifully.

"Good night, Father," the detective responded with what he hoped didn't sound like disinterest.

Baaya waited until she heard her master's footsteps reach the top of the stairs before she turned to her foster-son. "Alright, Saguru. What's the matter? You've been down in the doldrums for about a week now. Is it a case or something, Sweetheart?"

"Or something," Saguru sighed. "Don't worry yourself, Baaya. It's just teenager drama; it's not important."

Baaya's eyes widened in interest.

Teenager drama? Since when did her child engage in teenager drama?

"Tell me about it anyway," she urged. "You spend too much of your time trying to get everyone to think of you as an adult. Be a teenager for a few minutes and tell me what's wrong."

"It's complicated," Saguru mumbled, pushing the brussel sprouts around on his plate some more.

"Probably not nearly as complicated as some of the cases you puzzle out at me," Baaya chuckled. "Try me."

"Alright. Don't laugh," the poor boy pouted. "Kuroba is in love with Aoko-kun, but Aoko-kun has a small crush on me and an even bigger one on Koizumi-san; however, Koizumi-san has a crush on Kuroba. Kuroba, for the moment, has decided to give up on Aoko-kun and chase after some mystery person I've never met, but they're always bloody on the phone together, calling and texting—always. I mean, the buffoon will stop in the middle of a conversation with you to text."

"Oh, Honey…" Baaya got up and came to sit beside her charge, running her fingers through his soft, wavy hair. "That is a bit complicated…. And you're upset because you don't think you stand a chance with Kuroba-kun?"

Saguru's face turned beet red as he whipped around to stare in astonishment at his caretaker. "H-How did you know it was Kuroba?"

"Same way I knew when you fancied your little friend Rodger when you were twelve." She smiled knowingly, patting her child fondly on the head. "I'm afraid you're a tad obvious, Bocchama."

Even the tips of his ears turned scarlet as Saguru buried his face in his palms. "God, you don't think he _knows_ do you?"

"No, Sweetheart. He hasn't the foggiest," Baaya assured, beginning to gently massage the back of her foster-son's neck. "A boy thoughtful enough to painstakingly prepare a surprise party for you complete with your favorite desserts would not consciously flaunt his crush on another person in front of you, if he were aware of how you felt about him."

"Good," Saguru breathed, sitting up. "Good. Thank you, Baaya."

"No worries, Dear."

"But…Baaya, what should I do? It's obvious that nothing's going to happen, so I should just give up, shouldn't I? I'm only going to get my heart broken, after all, so shouldn't I just give up on this love nonsense?" the teen grumbled.

"Saguru, you're being overdramatic," Baaya laughed.

"Baaya, I'm being serious. It's obvious I'm meant to be alone, so why even try?" Saguru pouted. "It's a waste of my time; I could be out solving cases. It's what I'm good at."

"Oh, use your loaf, Child," Baaya chuckled all the harder. "Humans evolved from apes, right? Well, apes are social animals, and we are too. We need to belong to a group. You're not meant to be alone; you're supposed to interact and bond with others. It's coded right in your DNA."

Saguru's mouth opened and closed a few times, but he said nothing.

How could he argue with science?

"Sweetheart, even if nothing romantic happens between you and Kuroba-kun, at least you'll have made a friend, right? Then you'll _actually_ have someone to do things after school with instead of going to the movies by yourself so that you can pretend that you're out doing things with friends just so that I don't worry about you."

Saguru's mouth opened and closed thrice more as he tried to come up with something clever to say.

She knew about him going to the movies to kill time so that he could pretend to be hanging out with his peers. How did she know that?

"Saguru, someone wonderful will come along eventually. You might get hurt a few times along the way, but love is worth it in the end. You shouldn't give up yet, not when you're only just starting out," she urged, gently tracing circles on his scalp.

"So…your advice is to just hang in there?" He had been hoping for a little more than that.

She nodded. "It's all you can do—make friends with Kuroba-kun, look for someone new, and keep going. Someday you'll look back on this and realize things weren't as bad as you thought they were at the time. You tend to dwell on things, Saguru. I swear you'll feel better once you learn to let go and let loose a little bit."

"Baaya, that doesn't fix my problem," Saguru sighed.

"Dear, it's not my job or place to fix your problems. You're nearly a grown man, after all. All I can do for you now is cheer you on and give advice and assurances from the sidelines," she replied with a shrug and gave him a pat on the back.

"Baaya, whatever happened to telling me what I wanted to hear?" the sleuth sighed again.

"I'd be a bad mother, if I just coddled you all the time. Sometimes it's necessary to tell your children what they _need_ to hear instead of what they want to hear." She got to her feet and started clearing the table.

"Baaya," Saguru whined, sticking his bottom lip out in a pout.

"You'd never get away with acting like that in front of your real parents," she scolded.

"_You_ are my real parents." The teen rolled his eyes and continued to pout.

"You know, my own boys say the same thing about you," his caretaker chuckled. "They tell me I'm more of a mother to you than I ever was to them. I suppose I was a bit too busy taking care of your mum and then raising you to pay much attention to my own children."

"…Do you regret it?" Saguru whispered, the pout fading into concern.

"No, Sweetheart. Frankly, I like you much better than my other two. My biological sons are both insufferable gits. They get it from their late father who raised them. You take after me. You're the only one of my four that I've managed to raise properly."

"Four?" Saguru blinked, wondering how he was miscounting.

"Yes. Four. Though, your mother Helen was already set in her ways when I became her governess when I was seventeen, but I've always thought of her as my first child. Frederic and Gregory came along a few years after that when I married, and by that time I was already quite tired of children and busy with my work, so their father, rest his soul, did the majority of the child-rearing. I remember I was almost in my late thirties when you came along. Helen's grandmother had forced her to get married and keep you, and the girl had no idea what she was doing. You were barely two months old when I came to take care of you, and you were my child from that day on."

She gave her son a soft smile and patted him on the head. "I suppose a little more coddling couldn't hurt a great deal. Follow me to the kitchen, and we'll make some hot cocoa and cookies. That's what you really want, isn't it?"

"Thank you, Baaya," Saguru chuckled, kissing the woman who had raised him on the cheek. "Can we go sit on the couch and watch an old black and white film too?"

"Yes, Child."

"And can we light the fireplace as well?" Saguru pushed his luck. "And make popcorn with chocolate and nuts?"

Baaya turned and raised an eyebrow at her charge. "Just how upset are you about this Kuroba-kun thing?"

"Absolutely devastated?" Saguru tried his best to look distraught.

Baaya rolled her eyes. "Alright, but only because you're my favorite."

000

Kuroba continued to come over once or twice a week as he had been doing since Saguru's party, and they often hung out after school, albeit with Aoko-kun and sometimes Momoi-san and/or Koizumi-san.

Saguru tried to keep Baaya's advice about letting go and befriending Kuroba in mind, but he found it exponentially harder than he had anticipated since actually spending time with the object of his affections was only making him like the magician more. He was totally smitten, but all he could do was grin and bear it.

Kuroba's obsession with his mystery caller was only growing stronger.

Saguru had asked once or twice, "Is that the person you like that you're texting?" and "What's her name?" but Kuroba had only replied, "Yep," and "It's a secret," respectively each time.

One day, while Kuroba was over to play video games, he'd gotten up to go to the restroom, leaving his phone sitting there on the couch.

As soon as Kuroba left the room, the phone pinged, signaling a new text.

Saguru had a brief moment of inner struggle before he picked up the phone and looked at the caller ID readout. He blinked when he saw the words "Kudo Shin-chan".

The only Kudos the detective could think of at the time were the author Yusaku, the actress Yukiko, and the detective Shinichi, but Kudo Shinichi was most definitely male.

It was probably just a text from a friend, then, and not Kuroba's crush.

Saguru put down the phone, utterly ashamed of himself for his ungentlemanly behavior.

However, he had to rethink his conclusion when Kuroba came back in and got _that_ look on his face as he eagerly responded to Kudo-kun's text.

"I-Is that…the person you like?" Saguru inquired tentatively.

"Yep." Kaito smirked.

"Oh. That's…that's cool," the detective stuttered.

Saguru wasn't sure what to think.

On one hand, he was happy because his being male was no longer an issue standing in the way of their love. On the other hand, Kaito liked Kudo Shinichi who was smarter, more confident, and a great deal better looking than Saguru could ever be; there would be no reason for Kuroba to downgrade to an inferior detective.

After that, Saguru tried to think of Kuroba as just a friend and endeavored to find someone else, but the magician-thief was like catnip to the detective—an unsolvable puzzle, his physical and mental match. He found himself comparing prospects to his friend, and every last one came up short.

000

"Kuroba, I'm busy," Saguru lied.

"You're not busy; I asked Baaya. Now, why don't you want to come to my Halloween party?" Kaito snorted on the other end of the line.

"I…" _…don't think I can handle seeing you today. _"…don't have a costume."

"Then go buy one. You've got plenty of cash, so no excuses," Kaito scolded.

"I'm not feeling well. I think I've caught something, and I wouldn't want to give it to anyone." Saguru debated faking a cough.

"The party's at seven. You've got four hours to drink some orange juice, buy a costume, and get your butt over to my house. If you're even a minute late, I'll be on my way over to collect you. Don't make me drag you out of bed." Judging by his tone, Kuroba was dead serious.

"Right," Saguru sighed.

"…Hey, you mad at me or something, Hakuba?" Kaito softly inquired.

"Not at all. Why do you ask?" Saguru replied in surprise.

"You've just been kind of distant this past week. I was kind of wondering if I'd done something to make you angry with me since it sort of feels like you've been avoiding me." Kaito shrugged, even though his friend couldn't see it.

"No, Kuroba. I…I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel like that; I've just been having a bit of a rough week."

"Wanna talk about it?" Kaito offered.

Saguru blushed.

His heart fluttered for a moment and then constricted in pain.

Kaito could be so sweet sometimes, and it just killed him.

"No thank you, Kuroba. It's just something silly; I'll be fine, but I really do appreciate it. Your friendship means a lot to me." Saguru was glad his crush couldn't see his cheeks turning scarlet, but he wondered if Kuroba could hear it in his voice.

"Aww, shucks. You're making me blush, but…same here, Hakuba," Kaito laughed. "Just come to the party. You'll feel better afterwards. I swear."

"Alright. Who all's going to be there?" It was hard to win an argument against Kuroba Kaito. The magician always seemed to get his way.

"Almost everybody from school said they could make it, and Kiku-chan and her…uh…friend Kei-san are gonna drop by. I have a couple friends from other schools and activities, and oh! My cousin Kudo Shinichi…'s cousin Edogawa Conan and his friends and various associates are coming. You know Conan from Kid heists, don't you?"

"Uh…yes. Yes, I do." Saguru blinked.

That had been strange.

"Well, that sounds fun, Kuroba. I'll make sure to be there on time," Saguru promised.

"Knowing you, you'll be early," Kaito laughed. "Oh. Hey, I've gotta go; I've got another call, but I'll see ya then!" He hung up before Saguru could say goodbye.

The detective was betting that the other call was from Kudo Shinichi.

000

"I knew you'd be early," the Kaitou Kid greeted him in Kuroba's voice as he leaned lazily against the door frame. "Come on in. You can help Mom and Aoko bring out the snacks."

"You're Kid," the sleuth stated rather intelligently.

"And you're Prince Charming, right?" the monocled thief chuckled.

"Right." Saguru blinked.

Now that he looked more closely, there were about a dozen differences between Kuroba's Kid costume now and the one he wore while jumping off of skyscrapers and committing grand larceny.

"You know, I'd thought for sure you'd show up in your deerstalker and inverness coat, but this is a nice change. It fits you." Kaito turned and gave him a winning grin as he bowed and motioned him into the kitchen.

"T-Thank you. Did you make your costume especially for tonight?" Saguru reasoned that Kuroba couldn't risk using one of his real Kid suits.

"Nah. I go to Kid conventions. I made this two years ago right after Kid's big revival," Kaito chuckled as he bounced up to his mother…who was dressed as Phantom Lady.

Saguru was not going to think too hard about all this.

Aoko-kun was also there, modeling a suit and mustache that looked very similar to her father's. "Hey there, Hakuba-kun!" she called cheerily. "Aoko's glad you could make it!"

"Good evening, Aoko-kun. I like your costume; it's very authentic." Saguru gave the girl a friendly smile as he set to work helping with the snacks.

000

The guests arrived in a steady stream after the party officially started at seven.

As Kaito had promised, those in attendance included most of the students from their year and many from the other two grades as well.

Mostly it was all people that Saguru didn't know, and Kuroba was too busy playing host to hang out with him for too long, but Saguru made due, chatting with his small group of friendlier acquaintances, eating snacks, listening to the music, and watching others play various games.

It was mostly awkward, but he was having a bit of fun despite himself.

That was, until seven thirty when the doorbell rang and Edogawa Conan and his party showed up—Mouri Ran, Suzuki Sonoko, Edogawa Conan, and several young children dressed as a fairy princess, Kamen Yaiba, Gomera, and…a scientist.

Kuroba greeted them warmly and made a big, Kaitou Kid-worthy show for Suzuki-san when she squealed over his costume.

Saguru noted that Kuroba seemed to be on friendly terms with all of the other children, not just his cousin's cousin (who had come as a Count Dracula).

Kuroba scooped up the little vampire and nuzzled him affectionately.

Saguru sat on the sidelines watching his crush after that for a great deal of the evening.

The way they interacted was…odd. Kuroba was teasing—flirting with!—the young boy, and Edogawa-kun was playing back. They talked and laughed and were often interrupted by someone—usually Aoko-kun or Koizumi-san, but sometimes Mouri-san and Suzuki-san as well.

Saguru sighed, feeling marginalized and jealous.

"Ya look like ya could use a drink," a deep, rather monotone voice observed to his left.

The teenage detective jumped, startled by the sudden presence. He hadn't heard anyone approach. Had he really been spacing out to such an extent?

Saguru turned and froze at what he saw—a rather tall man of mixed Asian and Caucasian ancestry with rusty red hair and the bluest Prussian eyes Saguru had ever seen.

"Just apple cider," the stranger assured, holding out an extra glass.

"Uh…thank you," our hero finally got out as he snapped out of his stunned silence.

"I saw ya lookin' at Kid." The redhead motioned towards Kuroba.

"I wasn't—"

"—What are ya gonna do if ya ever catch 'em?" Those ocean blue eyes stared at Saguru like they could see straight through him.

The detective took a tentative sip of his cider and took a long, hard look at his target. He sighed. "I used to think that I would lock him up, put him behind bars where he could do no harm and where no harm could befall him. Lately, though, I've been rethinking my plan. A jail cell no longer seems like a safe place for him, so I've been trying to come up with some alternatives. No matter what, I plan on protecting him."

His companion nodded, the corner of his mouth turning up slightly—a smile? "That's a good answer."

"I'm sorry, but what did you say your name was again?" Saguru found himself slightly disturbed by the empty smile and vacant eyes of the other man.

"I never did."

"I'm Hakuba Saguru. It's a pleasure meeting you," Saguru started the introductions, growing slightly more creeped out by the minute.

"I know who you are," the older man replied a little too eerily for Saguru's taste.

"Kei! There you are! You wondered off while I was kicking that guy's ass at darts," an alto female voice scolded, and Saguru's mystery man turned around.

"Chris," he greeted. "Gets boring the third time in a row. I was talkin' to Hakuba Saguru."

"Who?" A lemon-yellow blonde with highlighter green eyes (probably cosmetic props) peeked her head around her larger friend and blinked at Saguru. "Oh! Hey! Nice outfit; it suits you. Don't you just love Kei's? I put it together myself."

Saguru turned to look over Kei-san.

He was wearing a brown fedora and a skin-tight, teal T-shirt. He had matching teal corduroys and yellow high-tops as well.

Saguru blinked as he tried to think what the costume could possibly be of. "I'm afraid I'm not familiar with your character, Kei-san."

"You're kidding, right?" The blonde girl in the blue, spandex catsuit gave him an incredulous look. "He's a semi-aquatic, egg-laying mammal of action! He's Perry! Perry the platypus! You know, Agent P from Phineas and Ferb."

Saguru blinked.

"Oh, come on. Do they not have Phineas and Ferb where you come from?" the other blonde huffed.

"Chris, he's Japanese, not a foreigner," Kei-san mumbled, his emotionless monotone sounding slightly miffed, and was that a semblance of a frown forming on his face?

"Well, they have Phineas and Ferb in Japan. I've seen it, and I like the voice acting." She paused. "Oh. You meant you were offended when I said 'where you come from' because he's a half—uh…I mean, only half Japanese…forget I said 'only,'" the girl began to get flustered as Kei's almost frown grew more noticeable.

She sighed. "Sorry. I always forget that you're sensitive about the half…multi-racial thing. You know, maybe _he_ isn't."

"We _all_ are. Maybe not some of the Asian-Japanese because they can pass, but the European-Japanese ones tend to be sensitive," Kei growled. "_You_ know what it's like being treated like you don't belong here because you look foreign."

The blonde woman nodded, turning back to Saguru. "Anyway…he's a platypus secret agent from a show I watch. I picked out his costume, and he picked mine."

"Zero Suit Samus? From the Metroid games?" Saguru hazarded a guess.

That little not-smile was back on Kei-san's face. "She has the body for it, so it's worth dressin' up like a platypus."

Saguru did not comment.

"I'm gonna go find Runt," Kei nodded to his…girlfriend? "You talk to Hakuba-kun about what we talked about."

"Rodger." She gave him a sharp salute. "Shouldn't be too hard to find Kiddo in his Kid costume," she laughed. "Tell him he needs to drop by my place to pick up the parts he ordered. And, in case I forget, tell him to bring me some almond Pocky—unopened and factory sealed and all that."

"Rodger." Kei saluted back and was off to find, presumably, Kuroba.

Saguru cleared his throat. "I'm sorry. Have we met before, Miss? You look familiar, but I can't seem to remember your name."

She broke into a hardy laugh and slapped him on the arm. "Goldilocks, it's me! Chrisy! No way you've forgotten about me already."

"Oh! I'm terribly sorry. Chrisy-san…I didn't recognize you with the wig."

He could have sworn he heard her chuckle "without".

"Don't worry about it." She smirked.

"Kei-san said you had something to talk to me about?" Saguru asked hesitantly.

"Mm-hm. Kiddo." With a toss of her head, she indicated Kuroba (who had set Edogawa-kun down and was now chatting with Kei-san). "It was right around his birthday that he stopped asking me things like, 'Do girls like…?' and 'What does it mean when a girl…?' and 'What would a girl think if I…?' Naturally, I got curious…borderline worried, and I asked him if he'd lost interest in Nakamori-chan. He told me he had decided to put things with her on the back burner for the time being and that there was someone else he was interested in.

"Now, don't freak out on me, Goldilocks, but Kei and I keep an eye on the people in the Kiddo's life, and that includes you. Think of me as his controlling older sister or vicious guard-dog or whatever you wish, but we just so happened to notice that you and the Kiddo have been spending an awful lot of time together recently. Care to tell me what you know about Kiddo's little crush?"

Guard-dog indeed. Chrisy's teeth as she smiled pleasantly looked rather…sharp.

"I can assure you, it's not me." Saguru took a cautious step back.

"Please," Chrisy laughed with a snort. "I'm no detective, but even_ I_ can work _that_ out for myself. If it were you, he'd be stuck to you like crazy glue. It's obvious _you_ don't have a chance, but I thought since you'd become such good pals that you'd know who it was I need to be running background checks on."

It hurt to have an outside party confirm what he already knew in the back of his mind.

"It's Kudo Shinichi," he mumbled, gaze dropping to his expensive dress shoes. "Please excuse me."

"Oh, hey." Chrisy dropped her belittling tone as she grabbed on to his shoulder. "Sorry. I didn't mean it like that; I mean…I tend to exaggerate. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings…. If it really is Kudo, you don't have anything to worry about. It's not gonna work between them. Kudo's in some deep fecal matter right now, and even when he does get out of it, he's got a girl waiting for him. Kiddo's gonna get his heart broken…. You know, if you're a patient man, willing to stand around waiting to catch him… It's just…I'd rather there be someone there to pick him back up when he falls."

Saguru turned back around and gave Chrisy a gauging look. "You're positive about this Kudo thing?"

"Oh, yeah," she replied quickly, with conviction. "I'd bet Kiddo's life on it."

Saguru had come to understand that that meant a lot to her…probably more than her own.

"I don't know," Saguru sighed, glancing longingly at the magician. "Even if I am there for him, there's no guarantee that he'll want me."

Chrisy sighed, stuffing her mouth with cake before she could say something she'd regret. When she'd finished chewing and really thinking about what she wanted to say, she took a deep breath. "And why wouldn't he? What's wrong with you?"

Saguru's brain stalled.

No one had ever challenged him when he'd put himself down in the past.

"Well…I'm…" He couldn't really think of anything.

"…Lacking in self-esteem because your parents didn't love you enough," Chrisy completed the sentence for him. "…Afraid of rejection, so you don't risk getting close to others and distance yourself by acting haughty and superior…. Unsure of how to relate to people, since you have very little experience dealing with them. They confuse you, so you avoid them…. Terrified of being alone, and yet terrified of letting others in. You're weak, self-pitying, and you love to wallow in your own misery. Kei was right; you're just like how I used to be," she spat in disgust, clearly having no tolerance for any of that kind of behavior or maybe just enraged by others suffering through pain similar to her own. "You, Hakuba Saguru, are broken…but you can be fixed."

"…How?" Saguru whispered, barely making himself heard over the thumping bass.

"First, it's gonna take a little effort on your part. All you have to do is let _one_ person in. Pick your person very, very carefully, though. You want someone you _know_ you can trust completely before you start to let your walls down, 'cause if you choose the wrong person and they end up burning you, you're never gonna be able to trust again. It helps to pick another damaged person; normal people don't have a way of really getting us, but other broken people kind of understand where we're coming from."

"So…you're saying I should trust you?" Saguru was a little skeptical about this plan of action.

"Hell no!" Chrisy snorted, clearly finding the idea comical. "Goldilocks, I'm not your savoir. I'm merely an interested party. Though, I did have someone in mind for you." She smirked and indicated Kuroba Kaito once again.

"I…I can't," Saguru muttered, looking away from the man he loved.

"Sure you can. All you have to do is stop dwelling on your jealousy and feelings of inferiority to Kudo when you're around him. Replace the negative thoughts with a mantra, like, 'He'll be mine someday,' or 'They're never going to work.' I used to chant 'She's all wrong for him,' and 'They'll never last.' It got me through the engagement…and the wedding…and the pregnancy…but then he placed his beloved son in my arms, and it didn't matter anymore because that baby was more important…. But I'm absolutely positive about the Kudo thing not working out, so you just hang in there, okay?"

"I'll try," Saguru compromised, knowing better than to ask for the story behind Chrisy's tangent.

"Good. Try hard." The strange woman took another bite of cake.

"So what's the next step after letting one person get close to me?" the detective sighed, not putting much faith in Chrisy's method.

"Talk to him about everything. Bare your soul a little bit at a time. Let him help you fix yourself. Once one person tells you you're okay the way that you are, it's easier to let another person see your true self too. Once someone else loves you, it's easier to love yourself…because you have to love yourself first before you can start loving someone back." Chrisy smirked sneaking a glance over at Kei-san and Kuroba, still having their own little chat.

"Chrisy-san? Just who are you?" Saguru finally asked.

She chuckled tapping the crystal chrysanthemum locket around her neck.

"You know what I meant. I mean, who are you? What do you do? Just how do you know Kuroba?" Prince Charming tried not to be short with Zero Suit Samus. He could tell she was somewhat like Kuroba—she acted in an antagonistic manner partly just to get a reaction out of people. He wouldn't give her what she was looking for.

"You're the detective. Work your Sherlock Holmes magic on me; you can probably deduce more than I'd tell you voluntarily." She shrugged, still smiling.

"Very well." He could use the mental challenge. "We'll start with the incredibly obvious—you're in excellent shape. You get regular vigorous exercise, but you don't do it because you're concerned about your health or weight. That's obvious by your choice of snack. There were plenty of fruits and veggies on the snack table, but you picked cake, and that's not even your first piece as is obvious by the frosting smudges left behind by pieces number one and two. Now, it is possible that you shared the plate with your boyfriend, but—"

"—He's not my boyfriend," Chrisy chuckled. "Minus ten points."

Saguru blinked, quickly running the data again. "He's not? But he…"

"…is in love with me? Yeah. It's complicated. We'll get married and have kids together someday, but he's just my friend. We work together. Don't worry about it; just get back to my multiple pieces of cake." She smirked, waving him on.

"Ahem. You could have shared the plate with Kei-san to cut down on trash, but he doesn't seem to be a sweets kind of person since he's avoided the sweet fruits in favor of vegetables and other, more bland snacks. I also observe that you are eating your cake slowly, savoring it without the guilt of a dieter. You are also not inhaling it like a binge eater who has been deprived of sweets. It is therefore my theory that you are physically active for your job.

"What could you be? A personal trainer? Athlete? Judging from the way you move, you've been injured severely several times in the past. Could still be an athlete, but from the way you watch people and take in your surroundings, I'd say you're some special branch of law enforcement. May I feel your hands?"

"Go right ahead." She offered them for his fingers to explore their marks and calluses.

"Ambidextrous. You use your guns quite often, but not the small ones you've got strapped to your ankles. Your main weapons are a little bigger than the two you've got with you." He looked up at her and frowned. "You strike me very much as a soldier, but based on Kei-san's earlier comment of you knowing what it's like to be treated like you don't belong here because of your western ancestry, I gather that you live and work in Japan. From your quite authentic Kyoto accent, I would say with confidence that you have lived here for a very long time with the exceptions of your brief stints abroad. You are Japanese, and you are some kind of solider, but that doesn't make sense because Japan doesn't have military."

"They don't breed and genetically alter people to be human weapons either." She smiled darkly but then continued. "And they don't make giant robots and they don't capture small creatures and make them battle and they don't believe that the emperor is a god and they don't actually think ninjas wearing orange jumpsuits are historically accurate and they don't believe teenagers can be shrunk to the size of children and they know time travel isn't possible because we've yet to see any robot cats come back from it and they don't believe witches are real and they don't think foreigners are capable of eating sushi." She stopped and smiled again, this time more playfully.

Saguru blinked, choosing to ignore everything he had just heard. His sense of reality couldn't take most of it. "Was I wrong about anything?"

Chrisy shrugged. "I told you that you could probably deduce more than I'd freely tell you. Incidentally, my name is occasionally Crystal Monroe, usually when I'm in trouble, and I like shopping and knocking the stuffing out of people that piss me off. My goal in life is to keep the people I care about safe and smiling. That's really all there is to know. The other stuff may or may not be true, but it's not important. The stuff that I just said…that's the stuff that matters. Who are you, Goldilocks?"

"I'm…not sure yet…but I'll get back to you." Saguru allowed himself a shallow smile.

"Good. Here's my number, in case you need me. Text first to make sure it's okay to call. Sometimes I go places where a ringing phone could get people killed." She handed him her card, slapped him on the back, and walked off before he could ask if she were joking.

He assumed she wasn't and made his way over to the snacks table, just to give himself something else to concentrate on.

It was about an hour later when someone tapped him on the shoulder, causing him to jump.

"Whatcha doin' being a wallflower, Hakuba?" Kaito laughed, coming around in front of him. "Aren't you having fun?"

"Kuroba…" Saguru bit his lip to keep from smiling like an idiot. "What happened to Edogawa-kun?"

"He and his friends have a curfew," the magician sighed, looking rather strange as he pouted in his Kid costume. "So, how's the party?"

"It's good," Saguru responded immediately, taking a look around the room at the various guests. "You know how to throw a party; everyone looks like they're having a good time."

"Are _you_ having a good time, Mr. I-Don't-Have-A-Costum-Plus-I-Think-I'm-Coming-Down-With-Something?" Kaito snorted, raising an eyebrow at his friend.

"More than I thought I would," the blonde confessed. "I don't do well at social events. I don't interact with others well, but I'm content to watch everyone having fun."

"Hakuba, where's the fun in that?" the host scoffed. "Life is not a spectator sport."

"It's fine," Saguru returned with a small shrug. "When it's all you know, you can be content with very little. You needn't pity me because I'm socially awkward, Kuroba; I have other things that I enjoy."

"You mean work," Kaito replied flatly. "Hakuba…" He bit his lip. "…Come dance with me."

"E-Excuse me?" Saguru must have misheard.

"Come on," Kuroba urged, taking his friend firmly by the arm and tugging the blonde towards the dance floor. "If you're not having fun, I'm not doing my job as host right. Now, we're gonna dance and play party games and what have ya until you have fun."

"But don't you think two men dancing together is a little…" Saguru blushed, not knowing exactly how he wanted to end that sentence.

"You homophobic or something?" Kaito's grip on Hakuba's arm slackened slightly.

"No…" Saguru shrugged.

The exact opposite, really.

"Just self-conscious."

"Good," Kaito chuckled, suddenly pulling the detective forward and catching him in a dance hold. "If anyone asks, we'll tell 'em you finally caught your thief, and I met my prince. You wanna lead, or should I, Prince Charming?"

"You lead; I'll follow," Saguru mumbled.

That was rather the way they always did things, wasn't it?

And so he let go of his inhibitions, taking both Baaya and Chrisy-san's advice to heart. He didn't bother worrying about the future and allowed himself to enjoy the present where he had the full and undivided attention of the man of his dreams.

…

o(w.w)o

Mikau: I think it looks a little vexed. It reminds me of a look my brother occasionally gives me. So, I watched that new Sherlock Holmes show called Elementary, and it was okay. It was a good detective show, but that man is not Sherlock. I much prefer the BBC Sherlock. Anyway, thank you so much for reading! I hope you liked it, and I'd be grateful if you took the time to send in your thoughts on the way out. See ya next time!


	3. Opening Up

Mikau: Hey guys! I'm glad I could finally update this. Sorry it took me almost an entire month. Contrary to what I said before, this is NOT the last chapter. We still have one left to go, and it's mostly finished. I just have to clean it up, so I'll try to have it for you by next Monday. Anyway, thanks so much to all of you who reviewed: foreverandeveralone, Kaito Dark, Raifuujin, MysteryConan, Shara Raizel, and Maria. Enjoy the new chapter!

Disclaimer: If I owned it, there would be a one episode a month limit on the Shounen Tanteidan, although, I am become a bit fonder of them recently. Maybe because I'm a Haibara fan?

….

Opening Up

"Kuroba?" Saguru looked up from his magazine and hesitantly called out to the magician currently lazing about, reading manga on his couch.

"Hm?" Kaito's head popped up over the back of the couch, and he gave his host a curious smile.

"Uh…you know how I said I was having a bit of a rough time last week before the Halloween party?" Saguru nibbled nervously on his lip as he tried to piece together what he wanted to say.

"Yeah?" Kuroba pushed himself up into a sitting position, draping his arms over the back of the sofa.

"Well, you asked if I wanted to talk about it, and I said no at the time, but…" How to even start?

In the interlude, Kaito got up and came to sit on the bed cross-legged beside his friend. "You know you can talk to me about stuff, Hakuba. I swear I'll listen without the smart-alecky remarks."

Saguru nodded, taking a deep breath. "Thank you, Kuroba. I…I was talking to your friend Chrisy-san, and she told me that, as a person, I was damaged and in need of fixing."

"She's one to talk," Kaito snorted. "Look, Hakuba, don't let whatever Kiku-chan said get to you. She's—"

"—She's absolutely right, Kuroba," Saguru cut him off before he could get the wrong idea. "Everything she said to me…she wasn't trying to be mean, although a great deal of it stung…she was trying to help me. She said that I reminded her of how she used to be, and she told me how I needed to go about changing in order to get better. She said that I needed to open up to someone that I could trust, so…" Saguru blushed, looking down at his hands in his lap, unsure of how to ask for help.

"You…trust _me_?" Kaito whispered incredulously.

Saguru nodded, unable to respond verbally.

"Thank you," Kaito breathed. "You know, we've all got trauma. I wouldn't judge you, if you wanted to talk about yours."

"Th-Thank you…I…I have issues with my parents," Saguru confessed. "As you may have noticed, my mother lives in England and my father in Japan. Their marriage only exists on paper. They met while my father was studying abroad, and my grandmother forced them to marry when they found out I was on the way. I think my mother's always resented me, and I don't necessarily blame her. I mean, can you imagine being forced to carry a parasite inside of you for nine months? She's very vain. She must have abhorred the weight gain, the stretch marks…morning sickness…back pain…going through labor. I ruined her life."

"Hakuba, I'm sure that's not true at all," Kaito assured, inching a little closer to his friend. "Sure, your mom might not have been happy about it initially, but I'm sure once she saw you and held you in her arms the first time…I mean, babies are a miracle."

"I'm sure you were thought of that way, Kuroba, but I can assure you that I was not. My mother was very vocal about how she felt about me. I don't think she realized at the time that I could understand what she was saying, but I did. I remember very well one day when I went to show her a picture I'd drawn. She was arguing with Grandmother about arrangements for my birthday dinner, and she pointed at me and screamed that she wished I had never been born. She called me 'that thing.'"

Kaito tentatively reached out and put his hand on Hakuba's shoulder.

"I always tried hard to be good…to be quiet so that she wouldn't have a reason to be upset with me. I tried to make her proud of me, but nothing I did ever seemed to be enough. I could never get her to love me."

"That's not your fault, Hakuba," Kaito sighed. "It sounds like your mom had a rough time, and she was just a kid too when she had you. Maybe she just wasn't mature enough yet. She was probably caught up in her own drama and didn't realize what kind of effect she was having on you," the older teen reasoned, wanting nothing more than to comfort his friend. He could only imagine how he'd feel if his own mother had said something like that in front of him when he was little.

Hakuba thought about it for a minute before nodding. "Yes, that's probably it. She's not sadistic; there would be no reason for her to hurt me intentionally unless it was lashing out in response to whatever she was going through."

"At least you have Baaya." Kaito hoped that offered some kind of consolation. "She's amazing."

Saguru thought back to all of the times that she'd held him when he'd cried as a child; the times she'd cared for him when he was sick in bed, bringing him soup and feeding him ice chips when he'd had a fever; when she'd comforted him after a nightmare; when she'd scolded him for putting himself in danger, all the while tears of relief and frustration streaming down her cheeks; when she'd patted him on the head fondly; when she'd humored him; when she'd laughed at him; when she'd reassured him; when she'd helped him with cases; when she'd believed in him….

"Yes," he finally whispered. "Yes, she is."

000

"Kuroba?" Saguru cast a sideways glance at his guest who was currently kicking his butt at Soul Caliber.

"Hm?" Kuroba smirked as he dealt Hakuba's character the finishing blow. He turned and gave his friend an innocent smile. "What's up?"

"I was wondering if we could possibly talk about something." Saguru shifted uneasily. He always felt awkward bringing up these personal issues with Kuroba even though this was the fourth—fifth?—time now.

"Sup?" Kaito set down his controller and spun his whole body to face Saguru so that he'd know he had the magician's full and undivided attention.

"I…wanted to talk to you about…Kudo Shinichi," Saguru tentatively broached the subject.

Kaito shifted, his head cocking to the side in mild confusion. "Yeah?"

"I understand that you are very good friends with him, and that's fine. I have nothing against your friendship, but…you tend to talk about him a great deal when we're together." Saguru snuck a glance up at Kuroba to gauge his reaction.

Kaito only nodded.

"In fact, recently, Kudo-kun is all you talk about, and it makes me feel…I'm not quite sure. Jealous? Lonely? Kuroba, I…I don't have other friends. I do not wish to deny you friendships outside of our own, but I would like to request that you maybe not talk quite so much about Kudo-kun and what you two do together in front of me. It only serves as a painful reminder for me that you have a life and I don't. I'm sorry. I shouldn't be so sensitive." Saguru looked down in shame. He was being selfish.

"_I'm_ the one who's sorry," Kaito muttered, petting Saguru's hair fondly like he would a dog. "And I'm really glad you said something. Do I really talk about Shin-chan that much?"

"Every other sentence, Kuroba," Saguru chuckled, giving a little sigh of relief. "Thank you for being so understanding."

"Don't worry about it," Kaito easily brushed it off. "I'm sorry I made you feel that way, but, Hakuba, you do too have other friends. We hang out with Aoko and the others all the time. You don't consider them your friends?"

"Not like _us_," Saguru mumbled, blushing slightly. "They are my friends, but…I can't sit down and talk to them like I can with you. I'm not very good at relating to other people, and I still feel awkward around them. I'm not to the point where I can trust them with the real me yet."

"If that's how you count friends, Hakuba, I've only got two or three. You're a detective; you've observed me, and you should know me well enough by now to know that I put a mask on every day when I get up in the morning. I may switch it out for a different one depending on who I'm with, but that mask doesn't come off until I go to bed at night. There are very few people that I can be me in front of." Kaito smiled sadly.

"But you do it to keep people safe," Saguru stressed. "I put up a smug, superior front because I'm afraid to get close to people. You keep people away to protect them."

Kaito blinked, indigo eyes full of…something. Shock? Surprise? Confusion?

"How…?" he thoughtlessly let slip, but quickly tried to cover. "What are you talking about?"

"Those people with guns at Kid heists." Saguru looked away. "I'm sure if they ever discovered Kid's true identity they would use the people closest to him against him. I understand why you keep people at arm's length."

Kaito growled low in his throat. "Hakuba, I keep telling you; I'm not—"

"—I know you're not." Saguru locked gazes with his companion. "You are Kuroba Kaito. You are my precious friend and a good, noble man. I know what I've accused you of in the past, and I am sorry. I was wrong; you are not a criminal. I do not understand yet why you do what you do, but I know that we are on the same side…and I know that you keep others away so that they will not be caught in the fallout, should something ever happen."

Kaito was the first to look away. Why was it that that stupid blonde could see right through him?

"I'm not always so gallant and noble, Hakuba," Kaito softly confessed. "Sure, I keep people away now so that they don't go down with me, but…I've been pushing people away my whole life. I'm scared, just like you."

"You? Why?" Saguru gasped in astonishment. He never would have guessed that the boisterous and outgoing Kuroba Kaito would be afraid of others like he himself was.

"I…I'm scared of losing people and being left behind," Kuroba mumbled. "You're not the only one with issues."

"Would you…care to talk about it? I'm here for you, just as you are always there for me," Saguru promised, heart beating a little faster at the prospect of his beloved trusting and confiding in him.

"Not…right now," Kaito sighed. "We'll talk about it later, I swear. I'm not saying I don't trust you enough, but…it's kind of _the_ trauma of my life, and I sort of came over here today to kick your butt at all of the fighting games we collectively own. I'm not really in the mood for having a breakdown and crying on your shoulder."

"I understand completely, Kuroba. Thank you." Saguru smiled, truly grateful that his crush was warming up to him as well. "Well then, would you care to try to kick my butt at Super Smash Brothers? Baaya just convinced my father that I needed a Wii in order to fit in with my peers."

"As long as you don't play as Kirby or Sonic," Kaito muttered. "No offense, but Sonic is a cheating whore, and the puffball…I have Aoko-induced trauma regarding the puffball."

Saguru nodded, trying his hardest not to laugh. "Don't worry. I usually play as Marth."

"You _would_ use the goody-two-shoes girly-boy," Kaito chuckled.

"He's not effeminate. That circlet is a memento of his sister," Saguru pouted. "And just who do you use?"

"Pit from Kid Icarus." The magician stuck out his tongue.

"That…suits you," Saguru sighed getting up to set up the console.

000

"Hey, Haku-chan?" Kuroba interrupted just as Saguru was about to take his opponent's second knight.

Saguru blinked. "Beg pardon, are you addressing _me_?"

Kaito nodded, gazing at him innocently.

"Yes?"

"Haku-chan, what do you think about homosexuals?" Kaito plastered on his pokerface, smiling and trying to look more like it was just something he'd randomly wondered and less like a question that had been gnawing at him for nearly a month now.

Saguru dropped his bishop. "Sorry?"

"Gay people—for or against?" Kaito picked up the fallen piece and exchanged it for his knight. He willed his hand not to shake as he held it out for Hakuba to take.

Saguru took the knight and set it down with the other captured pieces. "For. I believe they should be treated like human beings and given all the rights and privileges of other couples."

'_But why are you asking me this? Why now?'_ remained unsaid.

"But I bet you still think it's gross," Kaito prodded, gazing down at the chess board but not really seeing the pieces. He just needed something to focus on besides the detective's facial reaction. "Like, if you saw me making out with another guy, you'd think it was gross…right?"

"Kuroba, if I saw you making out with a _woman_, I'd think it was gross. I'm a little squeamish when it comes to physical romantic interactions, if you hadn't noticed." Then it clicked. "Kuroba, if this is you being worried about my reaction when you tell me you're bisexual, you can save it…. I already know, and I…I'd be a hypocrite if I told you it was gross or wrong or anything."

Saguru turned away, his cheeks alternating between several fetching shades of scarlet.

"You…knew," Kaito hummed.

"Yes, for a while, actually," Saguru muttered, fiddling with a captured pawn.

"Wait. You too?" the magician chuckled like some kind of small monkey Saguru had seen before at the zoo.

"Yes," he grumbled. "So what? If you can be one, then I can be one too." He gave a little snort.

"No, it's fine," Kaito finished up his giggle spell. "I just always thought you were asexual. That's all. Though, I guess you did tell me at my birthday party that there was someone you already liked and that was why you weren't interested in Aoko."

Even the blonde's ears were turning red now.

"So, is this person you like a guy or a girl?" the nosey magician pried, sounding like a gossipy high school girl.

"The person I like is male," Saguru confirmed, "but I'm not telling you who just yet, so you'll have to be patient and wait. I know how hard that will be for you."

Kaito stuck out his lip and pouted, looking absolutely kissable.

_Bad boy. Naughty thoughts._

"Fine," the brunette huffed. "Then I'm not gonna tell you who I like either."

"Kuroba, you talk about Kudo-kun all of the time. I'd be a bonehead if I hadn't noticed." Saguru rolled his eyes, smiling fondly at his crush.

For once, Kuroba was silent. "…Fine. You win this round."

Saguru just chuckled.

"At least we can talk about boys now. I kinda didn't want to do that with Aoko. It'd be awkward, and she's probably more interested in talking about girls anyway." Kaito sighed. "Checkmate."

Saguru frowned.

Now when had that happened?

000

"Hey, Kuroba?" Saguru whispered from where he lay on the floor, curled up in the spare futon. "Are you still awake?"

"Yep," the magician lying on the couch not two feet away replied.

They had fought over who should sleep in the bed—Saguru insisting that the guest should have the more comfortable sleeping place, and Kaito proclaiming that he wasn't about to kick a guy out of his own bed—and Kaito had won, claiming the couch as his own. Determined not to lose to his stubborn crush, Saguru had gotten out the extra futon that was rarely used (read as "never") and set it up for himself at the foot of the sofa.

"I can't seem to get to sleep."

"Me either." The magician repositioned himself—Saguru could hear the blankets rustle.

"Can we talk about something?" Saguru held his breath.

"Sure." The blankets rustled again, and Saguru imagined the smaller teen had just shrugged. "Nothing too depressing, though."

"Alright. I told you before about how all the other kids at school thought I was a cursed weirdo, so I didn't have any friends, right?" Saguru quickly summed up his childhood trauma without so much as choking on or stuttering any of the words.

They didn't evoke the raw emotions they used to. They were just facts, events that happened in the past. Maybe there was something to Chrisy-san's version of therapy after all.

"This is after your only friend got kidnapped and refused to have anything to do with you anymore?" Kaito clarified, hoping he didn't sound too blasé.

"Yes. After that. I asked my father for a dog because I was lonely. I wanted a golden retriever named Antoinette or a German Shepard named Duchess, but he said no. He's allergic, and he was unwilling to take medication so that I could have a companion," Saguru sighed.

"Did he at least get you a goldfish or something?" Kaito snorted. He really hated stories about Hakuba's family; they could all be such inconsiderate jerks.

"No. He's never gotten me a pet," Saguru mumbled. "I asked Mother for the dog too, and she said no for the same reason."

"She's allergic too?" Kaito made a thoughtful noise. "But you're not? What 'er the chances?"

"She's actually just fine. I meant that she said no because my father's allergic," Saguru explained.

"But your dad doesn't even live in the same country," Kuroba scoffed.

"I know, but I believe that she had a dog that she was particularly close to in her youth. Since its demise, she seems to have forsaken pets. I'm never going to get a puppy," the detective sighed, sounding a great deal like the child he never got to be.

"You have Watson," Kaito gently reminded.

"Watson's wonderful, but she's not a puppy," Saguru pouted.

"I'll talk to my mom. Maybe you can get one and hide it at our house," Kaito chuckled, but continued before Saguru could ask whether or not the older teen was serious. "You know, when I was little, I really wanted a cat, but my old man said we couldn't get one because it would bother the doves…and the turkey."

"I'm sorry, you had a turkey growing up? Please forgive me if I don't feel sorry about you not getting your cat," Saguru scoffed.

This got a chuckle out of Kaito. "Yeah. One of my dad's signature tricks was pulling a turkey out of his hat."

"Can _you_ do anything like that?" Saguru glanced up at his friend, craning his neck so that he could see without getting up. "I mean, the only magician I've really ever seen is Kid. I've witnessed your tricks and pranks in class, but I'd be very much interested in seeing you do a show or something."

"Hmm…a show…maybe at Aoko's Christmas party or something…that's coming up in three weeks, isn't it?" Kaito planned out loud to himself. "Hey, Haku-chan?"

"Hmm?" Saguru had come to accept and even become fond of his nickname.

"Can we talk about something?"

"Of course, Kuroba," Saguru mumbled back into the darkness.

"It's about my old man," Kaito whispered. "He was killed, you know. He was doing a show at the time, and they made it look like an accident, but it was murder. My dad triple and quadruple checked everything. There was no way it was just some careless mistake. My dad was really cautious, and he always made sure that no one got hurt…. Someone messed up the trick on purpose."

"Ku-Kuroba…" He could hear his friend shaking as the magician's breathing sped up.

"It was when I was little…eight. We were gonna go out to eat after the show, but…I was gonna get a big ice cream sundae with whipped cream and nuts _and_ a cherry, and I was gonna eat it all by myself 'cause it was my birthday, b-but…" Kaito's voice broke in a mix of rage and sorrow.

"Oh, Kuroba." Saguru got up and took a seat on the couch beside his friend who was now curled into a little, trembling ball, his arms wrapped around his legs and his head resting on his knees. "It's alright. Go on and cry."

The magician began to whimper quietly as Saguru placed a hand on his back and gently traced circles, hoping the motion was soothing.

Kaito settled down after a few minutes and sheepishly accepted Saguru's proffered handkerchief. "Thanks," he whispered. "I was really close to my dad. He was my hero, and losing him like that was…well, rough."

"Naturally, though 'rough' may be an understatement." Saguru continued the circular rubbing motion.

"Yeah. Traumatic is more like it," Kaito sighed. "Ten years later, I'm still not over it."

"You don't have to be, you know," Saguru comforted. "You have every right to grieve and be affected by it; it had a great impact on your life. Perhaps, though, you shouldn't allow it so much control. That's where things get to be unhealthy, and I'm sure your father wouldn't want that."

Kaito nodded, mopping up his face some more. "I know. It's hard, though. The pain of losing him was really scarring. It makes me scared to open up. I can't get truly close to people because I'm afraid they're going to leave me or something's going to happen to them."

"You know, you may not have considered it, but perhaps getting closer to more people would help. I've seen a lot of loss throughout my career as a detective, and those that cope best seem to have large support systems. Maybe it would be easier on you if you had more people to function as a safety net, should anything ever happen," the sleuth suggested.

Kaito blinked. "So…you're saying that I should make more friends so that they can comfort me if any of them ever leave or come to an untimely demise?"

"Basically."

Kaito nodded, eyes going unfocused as he considered his options. "You know, I think you have a point."

"I usually do." Saguru shrugged, chuckling softly at his crush. "Better now, Kuroba?"

"Yeah, a little. Sorry for breaking down on ya, and thanks for…" Kaito gestured to the handkerchief and Hakuba's arm. "…ya know. Everything."

"Don't worry about it." Saguru easily waved it away. "After all, you _did_ warn me that you were going to have a breakdown and cry on my shoulder." He patted his crush lightly on the head. "Goodnight, Kuroba."

"Night, Haku-chan," the magician returned as his friend climbed back into the futon.

"Hey, Haku-chan?" Kaito called out several minutes later, breaking the silence once again.

"Yes, Kuroba?" Saguru forced his eyelids to open once more.

"Can I come down there with you? It's kind of cold," Kaito lied.

Saguru's body temperature began to climb as his cheeks turned a deep crimson. "O-Of course. I don't mind, but are you sure you don't just want me to fetch you some additional covers?" He gulped.

"You don't have to say 'yes' if it makes you uncomfortable," Kaito mumbled, ashamed of his sudden urge to be close to another warm body.

"No, not at all," Saguru rushed to reassure his intended. "I just…If you want to, I…Here." Saguru gulped, holding up the covers so that Kaito could slide in beside him.

Kaito grabbed his pillow and eagerly settled in. "Thanks. Sorry this is kind of awkward; I mean, it's not like we're little kids anymore."

"I never had anyone to do this with when I _was_ a little kid," Saguru whispered thoughtfully as Kaito made himself comfortable, less than an inch away but extremely careful to keep any part of their skin or clothing from touching.

"Aoko and I did this when we had sleepovers…." He hesitated before bringing up his beloved in front of his friend. "Shin-chan and I used to curl up like lovers with our arms and legs all twisted together. I loved it when he held me while I slept."

"That's right. You two knew each other when you were little because you are cousins," Saguru hummed pensively. "Doesn't that make what you two have incest?"

"It only counts if you have kids," Kaito pouted, giving his friend a light swat.

"No, I believe any feelings of a romantic nature count as incest, even if you don't intend to have intercourse," Saguru chuckled, fending off Kaito's half-hearted assault.

"I didn't say _anything_ about not planning on having sex," Kaito snickered. "Once Shin-chan and I get things sorted out and he's…back permanently from working on his case, I plan on having it every day, several times."

Saguru's face went beet red, and he tried to look anywhere but into those bloody gorgeous violet eyes. "Let's…talk about something else, shall we?"

Kaito broke out in giggles, and Saguru could feel the little puffs of air on his face. "Geez, Hakuba. You're such a gentleman…so pure and innocent. It's cute, but…don't you ever think about…you know?"

"N-No," Saguru stuttered, still trying to avoid eye contact. _'Especially not when _you're_ in my futon.'_

"I bet you do; you just don't want to admit it." Kaito snorted, playfully tussling his friend's hair. "Would you rather be on top or be on the receiving end of things?"

Saguru blinked, blushing an even darker shade of maroon. "I'm not sure I quite understand the question. Wh-What do you mean?"

Now it was Kaito's turn to blink and cock his head to the side. "You…don't know how it works?"

Saguru tried to look away to hide his embarrassment, but it was a little hard with the other teen just inches away. He shook his head. "Not between two men, no. I understand where babies come from just fine, it's just…no one's ever taken the time to explain to me how two men go about making love."

Kaito nodded, and responded gently, refraining from laughing. "Same principle, just different orifice."

Saguru blinked, not connecting the dots.

"You know," Kaito chuckled, slapping his friend on the butt.

Saguru gasped (for several different reasons), and his face went white. "You're not serious, are you?!"

Kaito giggled like a chimp.

"Wouldn't that hurt?!"

"Shhh! Baaya will hear you," the magician sputtered, trying to get his laughing under control.

"Is that even sanitary?!"

"Shhh!" Kaito clamped one hand over his friend's mouth and the other over his own. Once they'd both calmed down, he removed the hands and smirked. "Haku-chan, you're adorable."

"Am not," Saguru muttered, blushing up a storm once more.

"You'll have to ask that guy you like to explain it all to you after he becomes your boyfriend. I bet he'll just die and take you right then and there," Kaito teased. "Make sure to look up at him through those pretty, long eyelashes of yours; it drives guys crazy."

"Let's talk about something else now, please," the detective whispered, mind beginning to shut down.

"'Kay. When was your first kiss?" Kaito easily switched topics.

Saguru blushed again and shook his head.

"What? You never been kissed before?" Kaito laughed. "Please. A good-looking guy like you? You've got an online fanclub. Even though you may not have a ton of close friends, you've got a lot of admirers. There's gotta be at least one or two that have stolen a kiss. Or, maybe some sweetheart in the past you've neglected to tell me about? Don't hold out on me. We're buds, right?"

"I…" Saguru shook his head sadly. "No one's ever…I've nev…I've never been kissed."

Kaito studied his friend's face pensively for a moment before closing the gap between them and planting a sweet kiss on the blonde's cheek. "There. Now you can tell 'em it was with Kuroba Kaito."

Saguru nodded, completely speechless.

"I don't remember my first kiss. It was when I was really little, so it was either Shin-chan or Aoko; I just don't remember which one got to me first. Since then I've smooched and been smooched, but I've never actually kissed someone for real," Kaito shared. "Someday soon, though, I have a feeling that I will. I'm gonna confess to Shin-chan soon…whenever the time is right, and then…. You know, Haku-chan, you should confess to the guy you like too. You're an awesome guy once you get to know you; I'm sure he'd say yes. You should go for it."

Saguru nodded, smiling softly. "Thank you for your encouragement, Kuroba, but I think maybe I should wait. I'm afraid he's already preoccupied with someone else."

Kaito frowned, reaching out to pat his bedmate on the head. "Chin up. A knock-out like you? You'll get him eventually. Hang in there."

"So everyone keeps telling me," Saguru chuckled. "Do worry. I know. In fact, sometimes I actually believe it, but…we should probably get to sleep. It's well past two in the morning."

"'Kay." Kaito shrugged, a little yawn catching him by surprise. "Night, night, Hakuba."

"Night, night, Kuroba," Saguru echoed, getting as comfortable as he could with his beloved not even half a foot away.

He woke the next morning with a surprise.

Sometime during the night, he had rolled over on his opposite side, facing away from Kuroba, but the magician, being the heat-leech that he was, had sidled on up to the detective and curled up right up against his back. Kaito's head rested against the back of his neck, and Saguru's hair moved with every breath the older teen took. Kaito's arms wrapped around Saguru's body, and Kaito's flesh was flush against his.

He concentrated on not moving, so as to not disturb his bedfellow.

Kuroba would probably be embarrassed should he wake to find himself molesting his completely _platonic_ friend. It would be better to pretend to be asleep until Kuroba awoke and removed himself.

This didn't happen for a while, though, so while he waited, Saguru tried his best to enjoy the way Kaito's lips felt on the back of his neck, the way the lithe magician's chest pressed into his back, the way Kuroba's arms held him, the way his body fit into the curve of his beloved's…everything about it was, frankly, intoxicating.

Saguru closed his eyes. He could get lost in all the sensations, all the feelings Kuroba evoked within him.

The other teen finally stirred, and Saguru screwed his eyes shut, trying to remain still. However, his friend easily saw through the rouse. "Sorry," Kaito whispered sheepishly, detangling himself and moving to the other side of the futon.

"Un," the detective gave a small grunt, already missing Kaito's warmth and longing for the day when his darling would truly be his.

….

v(AwA)v

Mikau: It's Herman, the gremlin! I'm super excited because my church is having a Halloween party this Friday, and I'm going as Little Red Riding Hood. I don't know how much fun it'll be since there are only two or three other members my age, but I have a lot of older friends there, and there're supposed to be games and music and food. We'll see. At least it's something to do. Have a good week guys, and thanks for reading!


	4. Reconsidering Your Options

Mikau: Hey everybody! Good to see you; how's it going? I'm a little sick. It's just a cold, but it's annoying, and it's slowing me down. Well, this is the last chapter, so I hope you guys enjoy it. Before we get started, I'd like to thank Shara Raizel, MysteryConan, Aniki-xvi, and Weasel for your reviews. On with the show!

Disclaimer: If I owned it, I would call in a fashion consultant for Ran and Hakuba. Everyone else seems to get dressed in the morning just fine except for those two.

….

Reconsidering Your Options

"You called to ask me what you should get the Kiddo for Christmas," Chrisy Monroe replied in an utter deadpan tone of voice.

"You know him better than I do, so I thought that you would have some ideas. As you have so kindly told me on several occasions, I have no experience dealing with others. I've never really picked out a present before. I wouldn't be calling, if I didn't seriously need your help, Chrisy-san," Saguru sighed, pacing the length of his room for the nth time.

"_You're_ the one he's been spending all of his free time with lately, not me, and, if you haven't noticed, I'm a bit of a hypocrite. I don't have much experience relating with others either. You seriously think you need my help, Goldilocks?" She returned the sigh with interest.

"Yes. I've got two weeks to find the perfect gift. Help me…. Please," he added begrudgingly.

"Hold, please."

There was a rather loud roar of a crowd in the background of the call, and Saguru could hear Chrisy-san rubbing some choice insults in some poor soul's face.

"Okay, I'm back."

"Chrisy-san, just where are you and what are you doing?" Saguru asked stoically.

"Pool hall. Kickin' butt and takin' names…only I'm not so interested in names." He could almost see her shrugging. "Look. You can do this. From the way he talks about you nowadays, you two have become pretty close, right?"

"Did he say that?" Saguru's pacing came to a sudden halt.

She cleared her throat. "Yeah, well, my point was that you know him. You know what he likes. You know what's important to him. A gift that you think long and hard about is gonna mean a whole lot more than something I tell you to go out and buy. If all else fails, take him window shopping and watch him. That's what you detectives are good at, isn't it? Observing and making deductions?"

"Alright. You're right, Chrisy-san. Thank you; it's just…it has to be something he really wants…something that will make him love me," Saguru mumbled, collapsing onto his couch with a sigh.

"You ever hear the expression, 'It's the thought that counts'?" Chrisy rolled her eyes, motioning for Kei to grab their jackets. "The gift isn't gonna be what makes him fall for you; _you_ are gonna make him fall for you. Kiddo's not a materialistic person. You know that."

"…Yes, but that makes finding the perfect gift rather hard," the detective groaned.

"It doesn't _have_ to be the 'perfect' gift, Goldilocks…just something thoughtful. It's not a big deal; what are you, a lovesick schoolgirl?" Chrisy mocked, rolling her eyes and digging out the keys to her motorcycle.

Saguru debated responding, "Yes!" but instead asked, "You know, I've noticed something about you: you only call Kei-san by his proper name; why is that? Is it that you can't be bothered to learn others' names, or do you have some other reason for it?"

Chrisy was silent for nearly an entire minute. "If you take the time to really get to know someone, you become attached. Calling someone by their given name is a sign of intimacy; we don't do intimacy in my line of work. That's why most of my coworkers call me Chrysanthemum, and that's why I don't bother with given names. I've lost the desire to be close to others…. Now, Kei and I are going to work; I'd advise getting the Kiddo a scarf or something. Knit it yourself; isn't that what young girls do nowadays? Then again, I'm getting my information from manga, so I wouldn't trust it. Goodnight, Goldilocks."

The line went dead before Saguru could quip back.

Well, that phone call had been both insightful and completely useless.

He made a note never to join any kind of secret service and went back to contemplating his gift. He didn't get very far into it before his phone rang.

"Hakuba Saguru speaking," he answered, wondering what his beloved could be calling about.

"Hey, Haku-chan. It's me," the magician not-quite-sighed. "What's up?"

"Kuroba…Hello. I was just…thinking about my Christmas shopping. Is everything quite alright? You don't usually call this late." The blonde's eyebrows knitted together in worry.

"Yeah. It's fine; don't read too much into it. It's just Mom's not home and…and the heat's not working," Kaito lied. "The repair guy can't come until tomorrow, so I was wondering if I could spend the night at your place."

"Goodness! Of course you can stay with us. Do you need Baaya and me to come pick you up? It's no trouble at all," Saguru assured.

"Nah, it's fine." Kaito nibbled on his lip, feeling kind of guilty for lying. "I'm just gonna take the bus, but thanks anyway. I should be there in about…thirty minutes. Thanks again for doing this. I really appreciate it."

"As if I'd let you freeze to death, Kuroba," the detective scoffed. "Think nothing of it."

"See ya then, then."

There was something in the background that sounded vaguely like an overhead announcement on a train, but then the call disconnected.

Saguru's brow furrowed.

If Kuroba were coming from his house, it would take fifteen minutes tops by public transit to arrive at the Hakuba Manor. If he were on a train and it was going to take thirty minutes, Kuroba would have to be coming from a different point of origin.

Saguru decided not to ask about it when the magician arrived on his doorstep half an hour later, looking like he was trying really hard to fool Saguru into thinking that things were okay. "Come on in and get warmed up. The snow's really coming down, isn't it?"

"Yeah," Kaito mumbled, following his host up to the bedroom. "Thanks again, Haku-chan."

"You don't have to thank me, you know; I do enjoy your company." Saguru debated commenting upon the slight puffy, reddish tint to his friend's eyes, but he ultimately decided against it. "You look tired. Can I offer you something to eat or drink, or would you perhaps just want to rest?"

"Nah, I'm fine. Can we watch a movie, though?" Kuroba requested, sinking down into the couch in his usual spot.

"Of course," Saguru replied complaisantly. "Was there anything in particular you wanted to see? A particular genre?"

"No comedies…and no romances…" Kaito responded after a moment of thought. "Do you have anything really bloody? Something with lots of gore or maybe a thriller/suspense or something?" The magician bit his lip. "I don't guess _you_ would."

Saguru frowned.

Why did his pacifist of a thief, a man who so abhorred violence and suffering that he risked his life on a regular basis to prevent it, want to watch some slasher film?

"You are in luck. By some fluke, I happen to own Saw 2. I've never seen it or its predecessor, but I hear it's horrific. Also, if you'd rather, I own the complete Alfred Hitchcock."

Kaito hummed, considering his options. "You pick. Just not the one with the kid with the bomb on the bus."

"Right. How about The Lodger, Psycho, or The Birds?"

Kaito pursed his lips. "The Birds?"

Saguru nodded, popping in the DVD and taking his place beside his friend.

About twenty minutes (and thirty-three point five seconds) into the movie, Saguru paused it and turned to look at his companion. "Kuroba, it's obvious that you have no interest in this film. Do you want to talk about why you're here? It's apparently huge, judging by the fact that, for the first time, you're utterly failing to mask your emotions entirely when you're endeavoring to."

"It's nothing," Kaito muttered, trying really hard to make his face and his words match. It was kind of difficult at the moment.

Saguru misunderstood his friend's reluctance to confide in him and sadly replied, "You know, if you don't want to discuss it with me, that's fine, but I'd prefer you talk to someone; you look a bit distraught, and it's not healthy to keep things like that to yourself. Perhaps you should call Kudo-kun."

Kaito winced almost imperceptibly.

Suddenly things began to click for our European sleuth. "…You've already spoken with Kudo-kun. That train you were on when you called me earlier…you were coming from Beika, where Kudo-kun lives. What happened? Did you two have a row?"

Kaito's pokerface broke, and silent tears began to stream down his face. He pulled his knees up to his chest and set his forehead down upon his knees as he shook his head. "I told him I loved him."

Saguru's mouth dropped open. "Wh-What did he say? He wasn't mean about it was he? Did he say something derogatory to you? If he's hurt you, you just tell me, and I'll beat him to a pulp."

"N-No," Kaito chuckled through tears. "No, nothing like that. Thanks, though, Haku-chan. It means a lot that you've got my back."

"No problem at all." Saguru scooted in closer and gently began to rub his darling's neck and shoulders. "You're my best friend; I'll always be there for you."

Kaito nodded, trying to get his act together. "He was really nice about it, actually. He thought I was joking at first, but when he realized I wasn't he looked terrified. He said he was sorry about a million times, but…he's got someone else, and he's not really interested in guys."

"Is he quite certain he's not in denial?" Saguru snorted. "I've seen the way you two flirt and carry on in your calls and texts."

"He said he was just treating me like he'd treated me when we were little. We were always really lovey-dovey. He told me he cares about me a whole lot, but…but he doesn't love me like he loves her. I'm like a brother to him. He said he was sorry for leading me on, but he still wants to be friends," Kuroba finished with a gulp.

"Oh, Kuroba," Saguru sighed, loosely wrapping an arm around his beloved. "I'm so sorry. Are you going to be alright? Is there anything I can do?"

"If you could pick up the pieces of my heart and put them together like you do the clues of a case, that would be great," Kaito sighed, taking out his handkerchief and drying his eyes. "Geez, this sucks."

"I know. I'm sorry that you feel so crumby right now, but it will get better, Kuroba. You'll fall in love again. Baaya told me that you sometimes have to suffer a lot of heartbreak before finding true love but that in the end it was worth it. I don't really know from experience, but…I'd like to hope that that's true. I'm sure you'll find the one person you're meant to be with. Who knows? Maybe you've already found them; maybe it's just not the right time for you two to be together yet."

"You're talking about Aoko?" Kaito hummed pensively.

"Yes," Saguru sighed. "But…until then, you want to know what I do when I'm feeling down?"

"What?" The brunette cocked his head to the side as his body uncurled out of its ball.

"I get Baaya to bake something with me, and then we make hot chocolate from scratch. Sometimes when I'm feeling really down in the doldrums, I get her to make me some popcorn with chocolates and nuts mixed in. Then, if I'm lucky, we watch an old black and white film together. It always makes me feel better. Does any of that sound appealing to you?" Saguru smiled sheepishly, hoping a suggestion or two of his helped because he really didn't have any other ideas.

"All of it?" Kaito gave his friend a tired smile. "You don't mind, do you?"

Saguru rolled his eyes. "Idiot. Of course I don't. You must not fully grasp how much I value you as a friend, Kuroba," the detective sighed, getting to his feet. "Follow me. I have a recipe I think you'll like; it's called Death by Chocolate."

"Is that even an option?" Kuroba's indigo eyes swelled up like balloons. "That's the way I wanna go!"

"If only we could choose," Saguru chuckled, leading the way.

They whipped up dessert, cocoa, and the popcorn mix before heading back upstairs to pick out a movie.

"Got anything with Humphrey Bogart?" Kuroba inquired sheepishly. "I'm kind of a fan."

"I have many a film with Humphrey Bogart," the blonde proudly announced.

"Pick your favorite then," Kaito snickered as he curled up on the couch with his mug of hot chocolate.

Saguru put in the DVD and settled down next to his crush. As the film played, he slowly stretched his arm out along the back of the couch, snaking it unobtrusively around Kuroba.

Kaito sighed, letting his head drop to rest on Hakuba's shoulder.

Saguru felt tears on his neck and gently began rubbing the smaller teen's shoulder reassuringly. "It's alright. Have some more cake; you'll feel better eventually."

Kaito nodded against Saguru's throat. "Yeah, but right now sucks. God, sorry for being such a wuss, Hakuba."

"I don't think of you that way at all, Kuroba," Saguru gently comforted. "I would say you're holding up fairly well."

"Th-Thanks," Kaito mumbled.

"You know, it's getting pretty late. Perhaps you'd feel better after a rest. I know feelings can be quite raw at night; maybe you'll feel a bit better in the morning," Saguru suggested. "What do you think?"

"Yeah, I could use some sleep," Kaito sighed, sitting up straight and wiping his eyes. "Do you think I could sleep with you again?" Kaito looked up at him pleadingly, embarrassment covering his face in the form of a cute blush. "Sorry for being so weird and needy tonight."

"There's no need to apologize," Saguru urged. "I don't mind at all, and, frankly, I'm impressed that you're keeping things together as well as you are. I'd be a wreck. Now go get ready for bed while I tidy up."

"Let me help," Kaito insisted, gathering up the dishes and retrieving stray pieces of popcorn that had found their way to the floor.

Saguru didn't protest very much as he prepared to spend another sleepless night mesmerized by the music of his beloved's breathing and heartbeat.

000

"So you're here too," Saguru scoffed, putting some celery and dip on his plate as Kuroba made doves materialize out of thin air for the Christmas party guests.

Chrisy Monroe shrugged, helping herself to the Christmas cake—her second piece, judging by the remnants of the first on her plate. "Nakamori-chan invited me at the Halloween party, and the other day Kiddo called on her behalf and reminded me I was still invited, so here I am. I came for the cake."

"I would have thought you'd be doing something with Kei-san," Saguru snorted, but his eyes softened as he watched Kaito preform.

"He asked me to dinner. I said no." Chrisy shrugged. "I don't want to encourage his feelings for me. I'm emotionally unavailable, and I don't want to hurt my best friend over it by leading him on. More importantly, Kiddo asked me to come here. He sounded like he needed me here for some reason."

"What wouldn't you do for him?" Saguru asked dryly, but was still a little curious.

"I'd say 'his laundry', but I've had to do it before." Chrisy raised an eyebrow at the veggies on Saguru's plate before adding a small slice of cake.

Saguru blinked. "You've done his laundry?" He then gazed down in suspicion at the cake.

"Sometimes he gets some rather pesky stains in his dress clothes," she replied offhandedly, making a point of looking away.

"You mean bloodstains," Saguru whispered.

Chrisy raised an eyebrow at the young detective. "Where'd you get that idea?"

Saguru shook his head. "Never mind. What I'm truly interested in knowing is why you're so devoted to him."

"Same reason you are." Chrisy smiled sadly as Kaito pulled a turkey out of Hattori Heiji's cap. "Love."

The word slapped Saguru in the face like a dead fish. "You love him?!"

She laughed at the very idea. "Not like _you_ do…. You know, he looks almost nothing like his father. He's definitely his mother's child, down to the hair…the cheekbones…even the curve of his grin. As far as physical appearance goes, they could be completely unrelated, but…the way Kiddo carries himself…the way he moves is all Toi-chan."

Saguru left it at that, telling himself that he didn't want to know. "Why are you wearing that wig again, Chrisy-san?"

"It's not a wig." She smirked, stealing a strawberry and dipping it in her leftover frosting. "So, have you confessed yet?"

Saguru blushed. "…No. He just got turned down by Kudo-kun not a full month ago. It would be wrong of me to take advantage of his delicate emotional state and confess when he's so vulnerable."

Chrisy snorted. "There's nothing about that kid that's delicate or vulnerable. He can take his bruises with the best of them…his _and_ yours. Tell him, and tell him soon, or you'll regret it. Let him know he's got options, even though he doesn't necessarily have to pick now. Just some friendly advice, Pony."

"…P-Pony?" Saguru hoped his mouth wasn't hanging open too wide.

"Yeah. What? Would you rather I stick with 'Goldilocks'?"

"Yes please," Saguru muttered. "Where are you even getting these nicknames from?"

"Well, I think 'Goldilocks' is self-explanatory, but a pony is a little horse, riiiiight?"

Saguru felt like he was back in grammar school. "Right. And?"

"Well, your father is the big horsey, so that makes you Pony." Chrisy grinned as she explained her brilliant logic.

"You know my father?!" Saguru's mind hurt.

"Our paths have crossed. My personal favorite nickname for him is Colonel Mustang, but we can stick with Goldilocks for you, if you prefer. I just thought I'd pick something a little closer to your actual name. You know, because I'm becoming begrudgingly fond of you."

Saguru's mouth opened so wide that his chin nearly skimmed the floor.

"Just talk to the Kiddo, okay?" Chrisy gave his back a good, sound smack before making her way off into the crowd.

Saguru frowned.

That woman was becoming his own, personal host of Christmas spirits—past, present, future, and Jacob Marley all rolled into one.

Maybe he should talk to Kaito? He needed to do it eventually, but…well, it could at least wait until after the magic show.

Unfortunately, after the magic show, Kuroba Kaito was swarmed by friends, fans, and assorted classmates for about an hour.

Saguru watched from the sidelines as his darling chatted with Aoko-kun, Momoi-san, Koizumi-san, Yamada, Tanaka, Watanabe, a crowd of male underclassmen, several female schoolmates that Saguru had neglected to learn the names of, and Hattori bloody Heiji, Mouri Ran, Suzuki Sonoko, and Edogawa Conan.

This last group occupied a good twenty minutes of the magician's time and seemed to leave the brunette a little…deflated.

Kuroba cheerfully made his excuses to take off and slunk his way out the back.

Saguru followed and found his friend outside, slumped over the deck railing.

"Kuroba?" he called softly to, hopefully, avoid startling the jumpy thief.

"Oh, Haku-chan." Kaito turned around, that annoyingly fake grin crazy glued to his face.

Saguru wondered if Kuroba knew that the detective easily saw through his forced smiles.

"What's up? Enjoying the party? Did you see my magic show?" Kuroba chattered.

"The party is…nice, and I quite enjoyed your performance…. Speaking of performances, you can drop the act. Doesn't your face hurt from wearing that huge grin?"

Kaito's smile faltered.

"What's wrong, Kuroba?" Saguru pressed, coming to stand beside his beloved.

Kaito sighed, slumping back down over the railing. "Aoko got to know Mouri Ran and her crew at the Halloween party; they became friends, so she invited them tonight. Well, Ran-chan brought Edogawa Conan, Shin-chan's little cousin. I couldn't just avoid them all night; it'd be rude, so I talked to them, but…Conan really reminds me of Shin-chan, and…it's just rough right now."

"It's alright," Saguru whispered, stepping in closer to put a supportive hand on Kaito's shoulder. "…but you're going to get frostbite if you hide out here for too long."

Kaito shrugged, sighing again. "Who cares?"

"_I_ do. You leave me with no choice, Kuroba," Saguru replied with mock regret as he pulled off his coat gracefully with one motion and gallantly draped it over the smaller teen's shoulders with the next.

"Now _you're_ gonna be cold," Kaito pouted, trying to give the jacket back.

"I'll be fine. I'm more worried about you. You'll get lost in thought in your sulking and accidentally let yourself freeze."

Kaito didn't deny it, but instead retorted, "Yeah, well, I won't if you're standing right there watching me do it."

With one fluid motion, Kaito swept the jacket off of his own shoulders and around Hakuba's. He then stuck his own arms through the sleeves backwards.

Saguru blinked.

His mind shut down as he realized that Kuroba was essentially hugging him, and their bodies were each quite in the other's personal bubble.

Kaito slowly came to this conclusion as well. "This…is kinda awkward, isn't it?"

"A little," Saguru hummed, wondering what he should be doing with his hands. He wanted to put them around Kuroba's waist, but… "But it's keeping us both warm, isn't it?"

Kaito bit his lip, shifting slightly. "Yeah, I guess so. As long as you don't mind, I guess…."

"I don't mind," Saguru managed to get out without stuttering.

Kaito nodded absentmindedly, eyes drifting to the sliding door he'd come through, mind probably wandering back inside to the party where Edogawa Conan was, reminding him of his unrequited love. He sighed, sticking out his lip. "Love sucks, Haku-chan."

Saguru couldn't help but chuckle. "Sorry. I'm not laughing at what you said or your situation or anything. It's just that you're so cute when you sulk. I can't help but think, how could Kudo-kun not worship the ground you walk on?"

Kaito blushed, chuckling as he looked away. "Geez. You sure know how to make a guy blush. Have you ever looked in to becoming a host? …I'm not that great, Hakuba."

"But you _are_," Saguru urged, about ready to tell Kuroba just how magnificent he thought the other teen was.

Now was his opportunity to confess.

"But I'm _not_," Kaito retorted, cutting the detective off before he could start waxing poetic. "I'm not," the smaller boy muttered, gaze dropping to their feet. "I'm just a screwed up little mess with daddy issues, a martyr complex, and abandonment anxiety. I'm just not meant to be in a relationship."

"Maybe not at the moment, but, Kuroba, that doesn't mean you can just give up," Saguru snorted, taking his friend by the shoulders and forcing him to meet his gaze. "You are the most selfless, caring, noble man I have ever had the honor of knowing, and one day you _will_ find someone to share a life with, but until then, you need to keep your chin up. I know it seems hard right now because the wound's still fresh, but you can't let this keep you down. You're stronger than that. Kuroba, I…I care about you, and I can't stand to see you like this."

Hesitantly, Saguru moved his palm to his crush's cheek as Kaito stared back at him wide-eyed.

"I've always thought of you as invincible…uncatchable…unbeatable…. Now, I realize that's unfair of me to hold you up to such standards; after all, even _you_ are human, but…after everything you've done thus far…all you've survived, all you've accomplished…after everything you've been through, are you really going to let this setback defeat you, Kuroba?"

Saguru held Kaito's gaze, and each searched the other's eyes.

"No," Kaito finally replied with conviction. "And…it's 'Kaito'."

Saguru's eyes widened and then he smiled, love written all over his face as he whispered the name as if it were sacred. "Kaito…Kaito, I—"

Hakuba didn't get to finish his confession, for at that moment, Kaito shot forward, pressing his lips to the blonde's.

At first, Saguru froze, brain displaying an error message screen for a minute while it processed what was happening. Then, a spark of electricity flew through his body, and his lips began to move in sync with his beloved's.

It only lasted a second, but it was the happiest of Saguru's life.

Unfortunately, Kaito jolted back as quickly as he had lunged forward, pulling his arms out of the jacket and pulling away from Saguru. He held his hands up in defense and laughed sheepishly. "S-Sorry. I don't know what got into me, but…but mistletoe!" Kaito flailed about, pointing out the parasitic plant hanging directly above them.

"Sorry. I just noticed it, and don't you get cursed if you don't kiss when you stand under that stuff? Neither of us needs any _more_ bad luck, so I…I'm really sorry. I bet that was really weird for you—like kissing your brother or…or something," Kaito blathered on.

Saguru gazed up at the mistletoe, and his heart sank. "I see," he mumbled, feeling off-balance. "Of course. Mistletoe," he chuckled bitterly. "Why else would you kiss me like that?"

Kuroba suddenly fell silent as the look on his friend's face clued him in to the obvious signs he had been missing up until that point.

Kaito's face went white, and his mind started whirring, trying to think of some way to undo the damage he'd caused. "I…I'm sorry. I didn't mean…I didn't…"

"Not to worry," Saguru whispered, trying to keep himself together. "It's fine. I understand, but, if you'll excuse me, it's a little cold out here. I-I'm going in to warm up. Excuse me," he choked out, making a hasty retreat back into the house where he immediately began seeking a place where he could be alone.

Kaito found him not ten minutes later, sitting, hunched over in a ball at the top of the basement stairs and sobbing silently into his palms. Kaito placed a cup of hot chocolate and a baggie of popcorn mixed with peanuts and chocolate chips down on the step beside his friend before taking a seat himself.

The magician remained quiet and still, letting Saguru make the first move.

Kaito made a point of not looking at the other boy, not because he was too ashamed to, but rather as a way to give Hakuba some space.

Saguru appreciated that more than anything. He really didn't want the guy he liked seeing him in such a sorry state. With a sniffle, Saguru picked up the hot cocoa and took a sip.

Kaito took out a pack of Kleenex and handed them back to Hakuba over his shoulder.

Saguru paused a minute before accepting the tissues and beginning to clean up his tear-stained, snot-covered mess of a face. When he was at least somewhat decent, he wiped off his hands and began to nibble on the popcorn mix.

Then, and only then, did Kuroba begin to speak.

"When I kissed you, I had no idea that you liked me."

"Of course you didn't," Saguru snorted, thankful that his voice didn't break. "You're not that kind of person, and I know that, so don't worry about it."

"Still doesn't make it right," Kaito muttered, sighing as he scratched the back of his head. "So…I'm that guy you like. I'm the person you told me you already had that you liked when I asked you about Aoko all those months ago."

"Yes," Saguru sighed, picking out a piece of chocolate to suck on.

"Dammit," Kaito cursed lightly under his breath. "Hakuba, I'm so sorry."

"Don't dwell on it; it'll only make things awkward between us, and I can't afford to lose the only friend I have over unrequited love. Besides, it's not like I want an answer from you. I know where you stand at the moment, but if in a few months or years you decide that you'd be interested…" Saguru picked up another tissue and dabbed at his cheeks.

"…About that…" Kaito broached the subject cautiously. "Hakuba, I didn't realize that the mistletoe was there until after I'd kissed you."

Saguru's head whipped to the left to stare incredulously at his best friend. "Which means…that kiss was…?"

"Real," Kaito muttered, fidgeting in embarrassment as his cheeks turned a peachy hue.

Saguru could barely contain the grin threatening to break out on his face.

"I don't know what got into me," Kaito began to blabber. "One minute we were just standin' there, and the next…just…the way you looked at me and touched my cheek and everything…and what you said…and…and…the way you said my name…it just…it made me feel dizzy. There have been brief moments like that before, but…that was the first time I really…I don't know…had a 'wow' moment like I do with Shin-chan, but—"

"—Kaito," Saguru called, placing a hand on his beloved's shoulder.

The magician turned sheepishly, an adorable, flustered blush painted on his cheeks. "Y-Yeah?"

"I just like saying your name," Saguru chuckled, gently stroking the magician's cheek. "…but let's not rush things, okay? Take some time to sort your feelings out and then come and tell me whenever you're ready. I want you to be sure about this, or it's only going to hurt us both. I don't mind waiting, Kaito. I'm very patient, so take all the time you need."

Kaito nodded, chewing absentmindedly on his lip. "So…we're okay?"

"Once you start calling me 'Saguru' from time to time, I imagine we'll be just fine," the detective replied with a smirk.

"Alright, Saguru." Kaito returned the grin, "Challenge Accepted" flashing in his eyes. "First things first, though: can I have a proper first kiss?"

Hakuba blushed, the self-confident look dropping off of his face. "O-Okay." He licked his lips nervously as his friend leaned in, pressing their lips together once more in an exploratory kiss.

Kaito pulled away all too soon for Saguru's tastes, but, truth be told, any more and he probably would have passed out.

Kaito chuckled as he surveyed the love-drunken state he had put the detective in. He decided that he liked that face Saguru was making a great deal and that he wanted to make Saguru look like that more often.

The magician sighed happily, stealing a bite of the popcorn. "So…now what? We just go back to play dates and sleepovers and regular old friends stuff?"

"That was the plan…until you decide you want to be something more." Saguru shrugged, so blissed out that he didn't even mind the minor theft.

"Oh, I want you to be something more, all right; it's just that my intentions towards you are in no way noble," Kaito sighed, leaning back.

"Then we wait. I will not allow us to simply become friends with benefits." Saguru put his foot down. "I am to be either your friend or your boyfriend. Please let me know when you'd like to upgrade our relationship status."

Kaito nodded, letting the whole thing really sink in. After a minute of comfortable silence between the two, Kaito dug out a small jewelry box from some pocket space that was invisible to the detective. "I have a present for you."

"As I do for you." Saguru blushed, grabbing his present from his jacket pocket. "If you wouldn't mind allowing me to go first; I'm sure yours is a lot better…. I had no idea what to get you since you're not a very materialistic person. There wasn't anything I could think of that you need or that you'd want but don't have."

"There isn't anything, so you didn't have to get me a present, Saguru." Kaito waved it off with a sheepishly laugh. "I'm sure whatever you did get's gonna be awesome, though. Thanks." Kaito eagerly accepted the present and carefully removed the wrapping.

Inside was a small paperback book.

"The Little Prince?" Kaito cocked his head to the side as he looked it over.

Saguru nodded. "It's one of my favorite books. Baaya read it to me when I was little in English, French, and Japanese. Those are some of my favorite childhood memories, and I just wanted to share it with you. I thought a personal gift might be best since I couldn't think of anything that _you'd_ want. I decided to give you something that was meaningful to me."

"Thank you," Kaito whispered with a grin as he looked at the book again. "I'll read it over winter break. I'm looking forward to it." The magician carefully stowed the novel away in one of his invisible pockets before handing over his own gift. "Uh…my gift kind of needs some explaining, so go ahead and open it."

Saguru opened the jewelry box to find a dog tag shaped like a bone and a single key on a ring with a miniature metal playing card on it—the ace of clubs. Saguru blinked.

Kaito motioned to the key. "To my house…" He indicated the dog tag. "…so that you can come and go as you please whenever you want to visit your puppy."

Saguru blinked, mouthing the word "puppy" as if trying to remember the meaning of the word.

Kaito grinned. "Mom said that we can keep it at our house for you as long as it's not too big. The grooming tools, food bowls, and leash are already back at my house, but I didn't get a collar yet 'cause I wasn't sure what size dog you'd want. The dog tag's blank, obviously, because you should be the one to pick out the name. Just let me know whenever you're ready, and we'll go get the dog."

Saguru was stunned, utterly speechless at his gift. All he could do was smile and wrap his arms around his beloved, happy tears streaming down his face.

"Th-Thank you, Kaito," the detective finally got out. "…I'm very much looking forward to having a pet, but…I want you to know that I no longer require its companionship. I have you…and the others now, but…thank you. Thank you so much."

"Don't even mention it, Saguru," Kaito replied with a grin, wrapping his arms tightly around his friend.

000

Over the next few months, class 2B at Ekoda High noticed a gradual change in one Hakuba Saguru's behavior.

He was becoming more friendly, less stuck-up; more accessible, less withdrawn. He was more open with them and actively making an attempt to include himself in their group activities.

Hakuba Saguru was making friends.

Kuroba Kaito was also noticing a change in his kind-of-sort-of-crush.

Saguru was slowly becoming self-confident. His shyness went away almost overnight after that Christmas Eve, and his reservations disappeared shortly afterward. He began to speak his mind easily to Kaito and stopped trying to hide the way he felt about the older teen.

Kaito found himself openly flirted with to the point where it sometimes made him go red in the face while his stomach did flips.

Saguru smiled more, and Kaito found his grin enchanting.

The detective talked about his problems less and focused more on things like what was going on in his life, his aspirations, and the latest cop drama he'd gotten into. He was becoming more self-assured, more self-reliant.

For the most part, Kaito liked this new Saguru, but it did make him feel a little lonely whenever the blonde made plans with other friends. Of course, Kaito was usually invited to tag along, but…still….

The first time Saguru had told Kaito he couldn't hang out because he'd already made other plans was a real shocker.

"I'm going to play pool with a friend," Saguru had explained, nervously scratching his cheek.

"Who?" Kaito stared blankly back at the detective.

"Chrisy Monroe," Saguru confessed sheepishly. "Monroe and I have been in contact for several months now, and she has just recently started inviting me to hang out as friendly acquaintances. I'm sure she wouldn't mind if you came as well, but we'll just be playing pool and slinging vulgar insults at each other in English."

"Uh…thanks, but I'll pass," Kaito had politely turned down the offer, wondering how _those two_ had ever hit it off.

There were other times when Kaito did go along, but he always felt like an extra wheel.

Regardless, whenever they were alone together, things seemed better than they had ever been.

Heists were every bit as exhilarating as they had been when Kaito had been crushing on Shin-chan, and having Saguru over every day to take care of Antoinette together was fun in a domestic sort of way.

Watching Saguru became a bit of a hobby for the thief. He found the detective enthralling; confident Saguru was incredibly attractive, and Kaito was willingly falling in love once more.

000

It was just after the new school year started up that spring that Kaito decided it was time to finally confess.

He caught the Brit right after the end of class before anyone else could approach the blonde, and he dragged Saguru out back by the old playground on the very edge of campus.

"Kaito, what's wrong?" the detective demanded when they finally came to a stop. "Don't you usually hang out with Kudo-kun on Thursdays?"

Kaito took a deep breath and looked his beloved straight in the eye. He immediately forgot the entirety of the carefully practiced speech he had prepared.

He gulped and decided to improvise. "Saguru, back at the Christmas party at Aoko's, you…you said that you loved me, right?"

Saguru blinked. "I don't quite remember coming out and _saying_ 'I love you,' but…what about it?"

"Saguru, I have to know if you still feel the same way about me now," Kaito returned, voice dripping with urgency. "I know things are different now…circumstances have changed, and now you've got all these friends, and you don't need me to help 'fix' you anymore, but…Saguru, you're the most important person in the world to me, and if you still feel the same way you did then—and it's okay if you don't, but—I want you to be my boyfriend. Will you go out with me?"

"Kaito…" Saguru breathed, wrapping his arms around his almost frantic best friend. "Kaito, nothing's changed. I may have others that I call friends now, but that doesn't make the bond between us any weaker. You're still my _best_ friend, and I didn't love you just because you were helping me. I love you for _you_, Kaito, and that has never changed. Well, maybe, if anything, it's only grown stronger…. I'm yours, if you're willing to have me," Saguru whispered, pressing a kiss to Kaito's temple.

"Saguru…" Kaito moaned, melting into the embrace and leaning into Saguru's kiss.

A high-pitched fangirl squeal cut their lip-locking session short.

Both boys whirled around and turned scarlet at the sight of Nakamori Aoko, Koizumi Akako, and Momoi Keiko staring at them.

"How romantic!" Keiko giggled, bouncing up and down like she'd inhaled a bag of pixie sticks.

"I told you so." Akako simpered. "Bent as a pair of politicians."

Aoko's mouth was hanging open, and her face was quickly starting to resemble a cherry tomato.

"How long have you guys been watching?" Kaito gulped but pressed his body closer to Saguru's.

Saguru, in turn, squeezed Kaito a little more tightly.

Neither was ashamed of his feelings for the other.

"We followed you from the classroom," Keiko announced.

"Nice confession, Kuroba-kun," Akako laughed, trying to keep the pinpricks of pain she was feeling at seeing the only man that could not be hers wrapped around another from showing on her face.

Aoko smiled shyly at her friends. "You two make a cute couple."

"Let's go get milkshakes to celebrate!" Keiko suggested, taking the other girls by the hand and motioning for the lovebirds to follow.

"Shall we?" Saguru chuckled.

With a smirk, Kaito stole a quick kiss. "Let's."

….

(-o.-) ZZZ

Mikau: Shh. It's sleeping. Well, that's the end; I hope you guys liked it. Thanks for your support up until now, and I hope to see you again soon!


End file.
